| 3. | business major | ||
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A member of a degenerate subspecies of humans (Latin name homo sapiens nequequam) that bears a marked visual similarity to ordinary homo sapiens. The homo sapiens nequequam can be distinguished by the following behaviors: * Whining at the end of the semester to their professors to give them a higher letter grade in a class they failed even though they don't understand the material because "they'll never need to know it anyway." * Exhibiting a complete lack of creative, artistic, scientific, or mathematical capacity, as well as any desire to exert themselves intellectually. * Having no long term goals in life other than spawning more ignorant brats, playing golf, watching football, and making lots of money, and generally succeeding at all but the last. * Prioritizing their school life as follows: 1. Getting Drunk 2. Fucking 3. Making Money 4. Staying Skinny/Buff 5. Spending Daddy's money 6. Driving Daddy's car 7. Studying * Insisting that their major really is as hard as all the others, thereby exhibiting a lack of appreciation for true academic progress reminiscent of a denizen of Plato's cave. * Voting Republican. HS guidance counsellor: So, what do you want to study in college?
Moron: I dunno. Counsellor: Well, what are you interested in doing with your life? Moron: Banging hot chicks and raking in the cash. Consellor: How do you plan to achieve that? Moron: Ima be a CEO. Consellor: ... Moron: Yeh dad sez I can be a business major just like him and then Ill have it made. Consellor: *facepalm* |
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| 1. | business major | ||
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Someone who ought to not be attending college. These people are generally completely clueless as to what they want to do with themselves but are too stupid to study a real subject and so major in business thinking that it will somehow lead to money. Sadly what these sad individuals tend to not realize is that they're a dime a dozen and should be counting their blessings if they manage to get a job that doesn't involve the phrase "would you like fries with that?" "That guy we just passed had business major written all over him."
"A real loser huh?" |
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| 2. | Business Major | ||
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Students whom couldn't handle a real academic path, and are now Excel jockies. They yell "BOOM!" in your residence halls while others with actual degrees (IE: Electrical Engineering) are progressing themselves academically via homework and studying. Resident 1: That kid is always roaming the halls yelling "BOOM!" and smashing his face into walls.
Resident 2: That would be a classic symptom of being a "Business Major." |
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