Velvet Merlin

A girl jerks you off while you wear a blanket as a wizard robe. She must use both hands as if grasping a hilt of a sword, pulling it from the stone. As you ejaculate, she points your dick at your own chin, giving you a drippy white beard.

I went to kiss my kids good night and forgot my wife gave me a Velvet Merlin.

by electrical discharge March 15, 2014

Heinskitz Velvet

In Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, when examining the tank, Heinskitz Velvet was the name that Ace made up when talking to the reporters.

Heinskitz Velvet, trainer of dolphins.

by Makecheeze June 11, 2009

Red Velvet

5 members who does NOT have a bad song. Not one okay, and also. Stream Zimzalabim their new M/V. They debuted on August 1, 2014 with Happiness.

Red Velvet can push me off a cliff and I'd be thankful.

by ;gguk June 19, 2019

Tipping the Velvet

Cunniligus. Oralsex performed on a woman. Tipping=licking & Velvet=Clitoris

Melissa likes to Tip the Velvet

by Margaret April 6, 2004

Velvet Rut

Any locale, esp. a smaller city, with few opportunities for career advancement that traps its inhabitants with its laidback lifestyle.

Victoria, BC, Canada

by cheeky March 18, 2005

Velvet Log

When you take a perfect shit that comes out so clean that you don't need to wipe.

Hey man, I just took a dump and didn't even need to wipe, it was a velvet log.

by AmPlefU June 23, 2009

Velvet Hurricane

An extremely good blow job involving mouth, hands, tongue, all working together in fast extreme motions like a hurricane but soft like velvet for great pleasure. Pretty much the most amazing thing ever. Porn star grade head. Definitely as good as sex. End result is loud moaning and extreme body tension and pulsating.

-"Dude that was like the best head I've ever gotten. It was like a... velvet hurricane!"

-"I definitely just got a velvet hurricane. It was awesome!"

by John the Baptist 69 May 19, 2011