Top Definition
An umptie is anything that will fuck you up. Alcohol, Marijuana, Acid, things like that. But it is a secretive term...shhhhh!
Yo man you got my umpties? I'm not tryin' to remember tonight!
by Ross Mofuckin' L July 05, 2006

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

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The Urban Dictionary Mug

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An umpty is where your sweaty balls stick to your leg and you can't get them un stuck.
1. I been running in this heat for hours I probably have an Umpty.
2. Look at that sweaty obese unattractive fat man run I bet he is gonna have an Umpty that not even a crowbar will get unstuck.
by Russell J Amirault January 15, 2009

The Urban Dictionary Mug

Lotsa space for your liquids.

Buy the mug

The Urban Dictionary Mug

Lotsa space for your liquids.

Buy the mug

The Urban Dictionary Mug

Your favorite word on a white mug.

Create a mug

The Urban Dictionary Mug

One side has the word, one side has the definition. Microwave and dishwasher safe. Lotsa space for your liquids.

Buy the mug

The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Soft and offensive. Just like you.

Buy the t-shirt

The Urban Dictionary T-Shirt

Smooth, soft, slim fit American Apparel shirt. Custom printed. 100% fine jersey cotton, except for heather grey (90% cotton).

Buy the t-shirt