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The Toobin 

When sitting on zoom calls becomes a drag, so you decide to take your dick out have a pull to help take the edge off and pass some time. The Toobin finishes the business and realises he forgot to mute the video, and sees his work colleagues staring in awe - only to leak the episode to the national press.
Hells teeth, did you see the look on Jeffery’s face when he realised we all saw his stand up wank on zoom this afternoon! That’s the best example of The Toobin I’ve ever seen! I heard he’s changing his name to Jeffrey Toobin.
The Toobin by Fingerpie4all October 20, 2020
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Tuggin the Toobin 

Masturbating or preforming a lewd act whilst on a video conference call.
Doug got caught Tuggin the Toobin whilst on a Zoom call with his colleagues.
Tuggin the Toobin by Not my reall October 21, 2020

tooting the rock

slang term for someone who partakes in smoking crack.
Mavis decided that after her marathon boaby supper that she needed to take the edge off, and proceeded to toot the rock whilst recieving a cleveland steamer from Rick. Tooting the rock took her mind off the fact that she had just recieved a hot carl.
tooting the rock by gmac2k November 2, 2009

tootin' to the pros 

Another name for a prostitute, or someone who acts or dresses like a tramp.
She looks like she's tootin' to the pros!

Tooting on the Boris 

Q; "what were you doing last night?"
A; "I was Tooting on the Boris and gaming"
Tooting on the Boris by lozda January 3, 2025

SYNONYMS: chokin' the chicken, spanking the monkey, flogging the dolphin, beating off, jackin' off, buffing the banana, wanking off, playing with yourself, tootin' your horn, fighting the purple helmet warrior, rubbing the one-eyed snake, commiting spermi 

Some neurosurgeon posted a definition for masturbate with a bunch of synonyms and decided it would be a good idea to make them all one big link, which is how you got here to this page. Here's to that genius.
I hope that person catches AIDS from masturbating.



SYNONYMS: chokin' the chicken, spanking the monkey, flogging the dolphin, beating off, jackin' off, buffing the banana, wanking off, playing with yourself, tootin' your horn, fighting the purple helmet warrior, rubbing the one-eyed snake, commiting spermicide, taking your turn at the self-serve station, fishing with your zipper trout, beating the shit out of your midget friend, makin' mayo, polishing the family jewels, test-firing the old meat missle, wrapping the hand around the penis and moving it in a thrusting movement.