impale means for a guy to fuck another dude in his asshole with his fuck-stick supporting the dude's weight on it.
by USAF Cadet July 31, 2021
The real Dracula. Far from the cape-wearing bloodsucker, Vlad the Impaler was both a hero to the Romanians, helping to defeat the invading Turks, and at the same time a brutal monster (butchering people to prove a point, once again to the Turks). His favourite execution methods outside of impaling included getting boiled alive.
Vlad III "the Impaler" "Dracula" Tepes was a hero of the Romanian people.
Almost everyone else only knows Vlad the Impaler for the stakes.
Almost everyone else only knows Vlad the Impaler for the stakes.
by GalactaK May 1, 2020
Vlad Tepes, Prince of Wallachia, was a figure in the Medieval era who has become connected with the Dracula legend. Forget bloodsucking, this guy was in to much more hardcore stuff. He impaled friend and foe alike. One he turned back a Turkish army when they saw thousands upon thousands of their comrades dead on wooden stakes. Once, when an envoy refused to take off his turban in his presence Vlad had it nailed to his head.
Of course, this didn't help Vlad when the Reaper came knocking for him. Eventually he was killed, by the Turks or rebellious nobles we cannot be sure. But his head was cut off, preserved in honey to keep it sweet and then stuck on a pole.
Despite his apparently hideous crimes Vlad was a good ruler. He insisted on total loyalty from his people and his ruthlessness aided him in his war against the Turkish invaders. When first ascending to power one of his first moves was to imprison the treacherous boyars who probably killed his father. And rather than heap favours upon old Lords he apparently prefered to knight members of the peasantry.
Although, as we've seen, it wasn't enough to save him.
Of course, this didn't help Vlad when the Reaper came knocking for him. Eventually he was killed, by the Turks or rebellious nobles we cannot be sure. But his head was cut off, preserved in honey to keep it sweet and then stuck on a pole.
Despite his apparently hideous crimes Vlad was a good ruler. He insisted on total loyalty from his people and his ruthlessness aided him in his war against the Turkish invaders. When first ascending to power one of his first moves was to imprison the treacherous boyars who probably killed his father. And rather than heap favours upon old Lords he apparently prefered to knight members of the peasantry.
Although, as we've seen, it wasn't enough to save him.
by Tyburn December 8, 2007
Street name for Lexington Steele. Porn star specializing in anal sex on white women. Gigantic penis known for annhilating the likes of Miko Lee, Monica Sweetheart, Gauge and Aurora Snow.
by The Kid! June 18, 2004
A mutant chigga with a hyperextensive penis long enough to impale most people. His favorite trick is to sneak up behind people while they tie their shoes, and ram his iron pecker into their anus and out through the tops of their heads - killing them instantly.
"Run, women get inside your homes and bar the doors! Men, grab whatever weapons you have and flock to fight the beast in the Town Square. The creature, Lex the Impaler, has broken through the city gates!"
by Anonymous April 30, 2003
by wisemanug April 26, 2006
The potentially best male porn star name known to mankind. Based off the legendary historical figure Vlad the Impaler who also impaled thousands.
by cjt119 March 13, 2019