Nolanoscope

N.
1. A tool used for or to aid in a Nolanoscopy.
2. A tool or implement used in the atomic examination of a sports entity or topic.

"Oracle and Google were integral Nolanoscopes in my report on the NJIT Highlanders."
"A-Rod, why don't you get comfortable while I warm up the Nolanoscope."

Nolanoscope by Hooo-aaahh March 11, 2009

Nolanoscopy 

N. Procedure by which a sports information topic is examined and analyzed in such great detail and with such great care that the reader is left with a feeling of complete confidence and tranquility with their grasp of the subject. It's often been said that the prep for a Nolanoscopy is the worst part of the process - requiring much research and creative thinking. The subject often requires sedation in order to reach the level of granularity required. Some instances have left the subject with a slight, temporary limp afterward and/or lingering soreness. However, when performed with the greatest of care, the subject will be no worse for wear.

"I can't go out for ice cream, I'm prepping for my Nolanoscopy."
"How can Mark Buehrle be hurt, Aaron is already halfway through his Nolanoscopy"

Nolanoscopy by Hooo-aaahh March 11, 2009

Nolanoscopic

Adj.
1. of or relating to a Nolanoscopy.
2. a quality of an event or action that is consistent with the penetration and breadth of a Nolanoscopy.

"To truly reveal the intricacies of this Tuesday's Nationals vs. Pirates matchup we will need to perform a Nolanoscopic examination."

"Khalid's work on the NCAA tournament this year was wonderfully Nolanoscopic."

Nolanoscopic by Hooo-aaahh March 11, 2009