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1.
The mental disease contracted by not getting any poon over a long period of time. Symptoms include increased porn viewing and more frequent masturbation (yes, even more than usual).

Known Cures: Prostitutes, Single's Bars and Frat Parties.
After chokin' the chicken for the 5th time in one day, Ken realized he had contracted Lackanookieitis and consulted the local Prostitute for "help".
by Psycho-J November 23, 2004