Annoying troll which lives underground,preferably it's mother's basement.Where it can spew it's hatred upon all via the internet to feel good about it's self.Can be found licking the floors of peep show booths. Has the mentality of a 12 y/o boy, as well as size and genitalia,if at all.Anything that can be said to a kelp will be twisted in such a way to make itself seem better than everyone.
Guy 1. I have a nice car. kelp. you're a fag, and you live in your mother's basement. Guy 2. My girlfriends hot! kelp. She's a bitch! I only go out with hot chick's, that's all I ever get, they all love me , because I'm such a stud, they all get in line for me!etc., ad nauseum.
by sunshine March 25, 2005
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To be in an enough of an inebriated state to sway and rock in the manner of sea kelp
Dude!! that weed had me totally kelping
by wait what huh February 21, 2008
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Pudgy little asshole who mocks others in chatrooms, to feel good about their own "shortcomings".
"All that jerk does is make fun of everyone in the chatroom, he's a real kelp".
by I.M. Noone March 20, 2005
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Unkempt pubic hair most often associated with female prostitutes and homosexuals.
Guy:Did you see that guys balls?
Man:No. All that kelp got in my way.
by Jeff July 25, 2003
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The coolest word ever to be invented. It is fun to write on the board and see if Mrs. M notices, which she doesn't. We laugh in the face of people who think kelp is an underwater plant.
usually just used in a one worded sentence like:
KELP!
or occasionally like a song:
Kelp! I need somebody, not just anybody, i need someone to Kelllllllllp.
by See Kelp Run May 4, 2004
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Similar to felching, but with an animal.
Guy: I caught some punk kelping my Pug! Lud: Why a Pug? Guy:Well if you saw the equipment on him, it was the only bree of dog he could do! Lud: well , I guess that's true, because my skinny little prick could only fit in such a small dog,that's why I have one!
by kelpsmom April 3, 2005
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Shortened version of "Can't Help It."
E: why are you always squeezing my ass?

T: I kelp it! It's beautiful.
by Daddyzgurl September 12, 2017
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