Kayak fever is most likely to affect individuals in North America, especially those in Western States, due to the large amount of gnarly white water available. It is typically caught by white males, although it crosses nearly all age, race and sexual boundaries. Symptoms include "geeking out" on guide books, both online and hard copies, as well as websites such as dreamflows awetstate, boof.com etc.. Those who suffer from kayak fever find it hard to concentrate on anything other than smashing through massive waves on their kayaks, catching eddy's boofing gnarl, surfing, stern squirting, bracing etc. Infected individuals often suffer year round symptoms of needing to kayak, regardless what time of day or year it is. These men often perform strange rituals such as "the rain dance" late into the fall, in hopes of bringing life to California's many wonderful creeks. Girlfriends become useless, other than for the occasional lay, and are often abandoned due to the infected individuals need to kayak seven days a week. Work and classes merely become obstacles which must be overcome in order to kayak ever more challenging and exciting rivers. Few things excite the individual more than running a new section of gnarly river.
As of yet, there is no cure for kayak fever
As of yet, there is no cure for kayak fever
Tristan: "Hey man if we get enough rain the North Fork should be flowing this Wednesday, you down to ditch class + work and hit it."
Mike: "Aww man i told my girlfriend i'd go salsa dancing do you think we"l make it back in time? You know what, I'm just gonna break up with that breezy and screw my classes, lets hit the fucking north fork, and the consumnes this weekend, and the Mccloud, and the Smith, and the Feather, and Upper Putah Creek, I've got fucking KAYAK FEVER MAN."
Mike: "Aww man i told my girlfriend i'd go salsa dancing do you think we"l make it back in time? You know what, I'm just gonna break up with that breezy and screw my classes, lets hit the fucking north fork, and the consumnes this weekend, and the Mccloud, and the Smith, and the Feather, and Upper Putah Creek, I've got fucking KAYAK FEVER MAN."
by King Casual November 10, 2009
Hey dude, urban kayaking is the Shijit!
by Pablo Esca June 25, 2006
by usahockey1 June 13, 2010
When you are innocently 69-ing a girl in the shower and right before you come, you violently slam her head into the ground, otherwise known as a tombstone, letting the load slide down her body.
by Gmal14 October 2, 2015
an all night session (aka FuckFest), with an overweight women, 2 jars of mayo (or Mayonnaise - Light or regular), and a dirty house slipper.
Mike: what the hell is that smell in your apartment?
Dan: what smell ?
Mike: why is there a wet slipper stuck to the wall?
Dan: LMAO -i was Hoggin' - figured while i was there might as well get a grease kayak all the way.
Mike: That is very wrong!
Dan: what smell ?
Mike: why is there a wet slipper stuck to the wall?
Dan: LMAO -i was Hoggin' - figured while i was there might as well get a grease kayak all the way.
Mike: That is very wrong!
by Mealoil July 8, 2010
An advanced bathroom maneuver in which one vomits between one's legs while simultaneously defecating seated upon a toilet (aka Tuck-n-Chuck). Chiefly used in public restrooms as an emergency party management technique.
I didn't know if I was going to hurl or shart, but somehow I managed to California Kayak my way out of there with my dignity intact!
by Jason Lester August 31, 2011