a talentless "band" consisting of three rediculously ugly, borderline homerotic brothers named paul, joe, and nick, who make millions a year by selling sex to preteen girls.

-Their fanbase consists of approximately 70 trillion 10-13 year-old girls who's parents won't let them listen to "explicit" songs and so have no idea what real music sounds like.

-In every song they say the word 'baby' about 50 times.

the only reason they haven't been arrested for being rampant pedophiles is because they wear "Purity rings" and say that they can't have sex until they're married. Thus, they are allowed to rape the ears
of trillions of 12-year-olds.
Jonas Brothers: Oh baybay, we want to stalk you and watch you through your window. Check out our awesome purity rings.

brainwashed preteen: Oh Joe, i want to have your babies!

joe bros: come into our trailer and let us have ear sex with you.

brainwashed preteen: Oh god, yes! Anything!
by beefjerky54621 March 26, 2009
One of the worst bands in history. Their main fan base consists of 12-16 year old girls who only like them because of their "pretty boy" good looks, which is lucky for them, because without their looks they would never have become so successful because their music is pile of steaming shit.

Talentless and boring is the only way to describe the Jonas Brothers. They refuse to have sex before marriage, which they in their own words describe as "pretty awesome". Pretty awesome? Yeah i think you will find pal, that premarital sex is even more awesome. Grow some fucking balls you poncey twats.
Paul: Hey theres a Jonas Brothers concert on next week. Wanna go see it?

John: Fuck no, id rather go and see a band with actual talent.
by jonas brothers suck balls September 19, 2008
A group that has no future in their life. They have really bad songs, and they simultaneously go out with Miley Cyrus and other crap celebrities.
Hey, you know that band Jonas Brothers?
Yeah, why?
Coz they suck.
by Mr X is asleep. February 14, 2009
Scum of the scum of the music world. Untalented, overrated, and loved by millions of mindless teenage girls. Mostly famous for their looks. The killing blow to any respect I ever gave the music industry.

Most fans are between the ages of 8-14, have little to no individuality, and can't type worth shit. Extremely annoying.
"OMJ!!!! I luv da jonas brothers soooo much! <33333 Deys soooo talented!!!"

Please, shut up, you sound like a retard.
by The Lovely Miss Misery September 23, 2008
Three guys (if you can even call them that) who for some reason have a shit load of fans even though they clearly do not possess any talent; you would realize this if you weren't retarded.
Their "music" (I almost threw up writing that) is supposedly directed at 8 to maybe 14 year olds, yet ALL THEIR FUCKING SONGS ARE ABOUT LOVE. No damned 10 year old knows what the hell it feels like to be in love. See a problem? Hopefully you do 'cause man, there's a LOT of them.
Random things I feel like ranting about:

1. They. Are. Not. Rock. Not now, not ever. If you think they are rock you should probably just drop dead now. Like, right now. Thanks.
2. ANYONE comparing JB to The Beatles should automatically just fall off the damned earth on to their own little planet of terrible music (JB, Miley Cyrus, all other Disney tools). It's best for everyone who actually know what real music is.
3. I see them EVERYWHERE I go. Which is indeed a horrible sight on account of I don't enjoy my eyes spazzing at the sight of them. And on that note...
4. THEY'RE SO FUCKING UGLY. Christ they look like deformed giraffes combined with dead raccoons (no offense to either specie).
5. It makes me laugh in a beyond retarded manner when the best insult fans can come up with is "YOUR JUST JEALOUS!!!!" ('Your' usually used instead of the correct 'you're' on account of their brains have melted to nothingness). The fuck is there to be jealous of? Sure I'm not famous, sure barely anyone knows my name, but I have more talent than they will ever have, thus, THEY should be jealous of ME. Biiitch.
6. Hopefully, if we are lucky enough, in a few months JB will dissapear without a trace. YAY FOR VANISHING
They have such shit lyrics! I'm sick of people saying that they're so meaningful and inspiring:
"I climb a tree outside her home.
To make sure she is alone.
She looks up and sees me there.
Still I can't help but stop and stare.
That's what I go to school for.
Even though it is a real bore.
You can call me crazy.
She is so amazing."
First of all, what the hell why are the Jonas Brothers stalkers? They sound like a creepy version of Dr.Seuss. Second, if a Jonas Brother climbed a tree outside my house to be creepy mother fucker I'd push him off and call the cops. Third, how are these lyrics meaningful? Well, I guess they COULD be meaningful.. to someone who's a bloody stalker and does this every night to some poor, poor soul.
& Yes, I searched up Jonas Brothers lyrics. Yes, I am downright ashamed. But it's better than knowing the lyrics! Gotta give me something for that.

ApparentStalkers CreepyMotherFuckers WhyDoPeopleLikeThisShit MusicIsGoingAllToHell I'dRatherBeAttackedByBulletAntsThanListenToThis
by IHadFunWithThis October 18, 2008
A Word that when you type in "Jonas Brother" in Urban Dictionary, you get a bunch of hate comments saying they are shitty. But if you search Joe Jonas you get a bunch of girly positive comments for some reason.
1. Joe Jonas 1124 up, 513 down

a member of the best band ever- Jonas Brothers

very manly, beautiful, funny, plays the tambourine
brother of Kevin, Frankie and Nick Jonas

1. Jonas Brothers 3883 up, 1774 down

A shitty, pop, rock band that makes it harder to apperecite good music today.
by Jonas?? August 02, 2009
The worst singers since Hannah Montana. Not only can they not sing their songs make no sense.
Jonas Brothers Band meeting, let's listen in.....

Joe:I love Hannah Montana!
Paul: Call me kevin!
Nick: I can't sing!
by mike is amazing like pie March 09, 2008
4. Way too popular!
1.Nick Jonas, Joe Jonas, and Kevin Jonas are faggots.
2. The Jonas Brothers are gay.
3. The guy is too stupid/gay for his own good.
4. These celebrities are way too popular for their own good.
by CTUDirector-C September 24, 2008

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