Jesus Jammer

Someone who tries to cram a fresh load of unwanted religion down your throat.

Keith: You should get in touch with God, Kenneth.
Kenneth the Athiest: What a jesus jammer...

by somedude149 May 14, 2014

April Jesus

Is typically any hot girl that colours her hair different primary colours on a regular weekly basis and struts around with a beautiful figure. She's the type of girl who isn't afraid to take photos in alleys in your downtown districts while in the rain. Hence April as in April showers and her beautiful figure is where Jesus' miracle of giving beauty comes in. Hence April Jesus.

Hey, check out April Jesus over there. Woot woot!

Look at those April Jesus' (used when seeing a big group of hot girls with primary hair colour)
Dam, she's an ugly April Jesus. (used when you see an ugly girl with a primary hair colour. so.. an April Jesus reject or a weeaboo)
Hey, I just saw April Jesus walking in the park.
Fuck you April Jesus! (used when upset with an April Jesus)

by lilacgirl97 May 26, 2022

Jesus Bagging

When your cross necklace repeatedly smacks a girl in the face as you’re having sex

Her mom thinks I’m a nice boy cause I wear a cross… she don’t know I’m gonna be Jesus bagging her daughter with that cross later.

by Julbean13 August 5, 2023

Jesus Cumming

Jesus did cum in his time he had cum 3000 times as soon as he was born.

I was watching Jesus Cumming

by JESUS CUMMING April 5, 2023

Jesus jazz

Christian rock performed in a megachurch (often by dudes whose 80's hair bands didn't make it big).

She's all into Jesus jazz and bible study.

by whittlesshittlestendervittles December 30, 2013

Jesus Sandals

XXXTentacion sandals:
Leather (Designer) Sandals with 3 straps and hook up to your ankle

Wow, XXXTentacion has the best Louis Vuitton Jesus sandals ON EARTH🌎

by liddlejadde December 16, 2018