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53.
His real name was Yeshua of Nazareth, the name Joshua being the closest translation into English. He was given the title "christ" by his followers. Christ is the Greek translation of the Hebrew word "messiah", which in turn means "annointed one". This was assigned to him because he was thought by his followers to be a messiah sent by God to bring about the "Kingdom of God"--the independent Jewish state. He was one of many military messiahs at the time who fought against the Roman occupation of Judea and failed. Most likely born of an affair between a Roman soldier and a Jewish woman and put to death for inciting a riot. According to the gospels, he attacked licensed business men at the temple during Passover with a whip. These business men were changing the currency for Jews that were traveling from other parts of the Empire so that they could buy sacrifices and fulfill their religious obligations. This terrorist assault was probably fueled by Jewish upset with a tax the Romans had placed on the temple that went to the construction of public facilities in Judea--such as the aqueduct and the roads. The Roman soldiers were at red alert during Passover, when Jews from all over the Empire pilgrimaged to the Jewish temple in Judea, as assaults such as this were likely to invoke a riot that would get many innocent people killed. The penalty for this was, quite reasonably, death by crucifixion--one was whipped, hung naked on a cross by the road to humiliate one and so others would see what would happen if they tried to invoke a riot, and denied a Jewish burial--having one's body thrown to dogs and wild animals to rip apart and devour totally. Contrary to popular belief, Jesus never claimed to be God. The term "Son of God" was used by many to refer to individuals that had a special covenant with God. The term "Son of Man" was an idiomatic and common Jewish expression at the time that essential meant "I" or "this man" and was the equivalent of saying "my/his father's son." The act of forgiving others their sins was performed by rabbis, who were no more asserting themselves to be God than Catholic priests are during Confession. If people were upset at him doing this, it was because he was asserting that he had the authority of a rabbi, though he had not been approved by the temple. More radical claims about his divinity are found in John, but this was the last of the gospels, and if you put the works of the Bible in the order they were written (Note: this is different than the order in which they are presented in the Bible. Paul's works were written first, then Mark, then Matthew, then Luke, then John) you can actually see the story evolving--with each step new miracles are added and old miracles are made more miraculous and the claims about Jesus become bolder. This is the general way in which tall tales work. Jesus's alleged powers were derived from Pagan God-Men such as Mythra and Horus. The story of Jesus's life as described in the Bible shares 200 points of similarity with the story of Horus's life--and Horus's story was formed and circulated hundreds of years before Jesus was allegedly born. The alleged teachings of Jesus closely match those of the famous Jewish religious leader Hillel the Elder who lived one or two generations before Jesus was born. After Jesus's execution his followers continued in his tradition, lead by his brother James, until they were destroyed along with other rebel groups and the Jewish Temple in 70 CE as the Romans crushed the Jewish rebellion. The view of Jesus as a spiritual redeemer was made possible after the more spiritual (as opposed to militant) and universal (as opposed to Jewish) version of Christianity preached by Paul (who never met the pre-crucifixion Jesus but claimed to have received a vision of Jesus resurrected), and opposed by James and Jesus’s followers, was all that remained. The war with the Romans that left the Jewish (and true) Christians destroyed allowed the seeds that Paul had planted to take root and take over. A militant messiah was no longer practical, so a peaceful messiah was created to appease the Romans and gain influence over them economically and culturally.
Jesus Christ--the religion based on him taught the world despair and taught life to hate itself.
by Freiheit November 25, 2005
21 45
 
1.
The name Bill Cosby thought was his growing up. He thought his brothers name was "God Dammit".

According to Cosby's classic stand-up routine, his father would always yell at him and his brother.

Something like: "Jesus Christ, it's raining, get in here. God Dammit, you get in here too.".

But then one day he was playing in the yard alone and his father called him: "God Dammit, quit making such a racket!" Bill just stood there looking around for his brother. "God Dammit didn't you hear me?" yelled his father to which Bill replied, "But dad, I'm Jesus Christ!"
Jesus Christ, the Simpsons are killing us in the ratings! God Dammit we're being forced into cancellation because of a stupid cartoon!
by Alfie The Horndog September 17, 2005
2038 826
 
2.
The “Prince of Peace” in whose name countless have been slaughtered.
Jesus Christ: the poem.

Jesus.
The savior.
The light of the world.
The big cheese up in the sky.
Who was nailed to a cross, so we wouldn’t die.
by nethcev! September 01, 2006
903 611
 
3.
Died on the cross for my sins so that I may be forgiven and gain the free gift of eternal life.
Billy: Mike, you *bleepin'* *bleep*, haven't seen you in 10 *bleepin'* years! How you been?

Mike: Well Billy, I'm actually a Christian now... and a pastor at that!

Billy: Well I'll be damned!

Mike: You don't have to Billy, Jesus Christ can save you!
by Mr. Goodbar X85 August 29, 2008
615 350
 
4.
Son of God - was with God in spirit before he was born in human form a couple thousand years ago. He lived a totally human life, being subject to everything all the rest of us have to deal with (including stinky poo, hang-nails and folks that don't like us) but didn't do anything wrong.

After 30 years of living, he began traveling around letting folks know that to please GOD, you don't have to be uptight about trivial stuff. Just treat others as you'd want to be treated, love those that don't love you back.

He then was beat up and sentenced to death. Although he had the power to escape the situation, he knew that it was supposed to happen so that through his perfect life, he would be a sacrifice to those who would trust and follow him. He did die, but then came back to life and conquered death ('cause we can't) for us. This gives us who have done wrong the ability to have a relationship with GOD (which is why we were originally created).

Having a relationship with Jesus is not religion, and being religious does not mean you have a relationship with Jesus. It's the relationship with Jesus that saves us - not from bad stuff happening here, but for eternity.
I trust in Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of my sin to save me from eternal death into eternal life with GOD.
by wilburforce August 21, 2008
417 175
 
5.
Jesus, a mistranslation of the hebrew name Yeshua and Christ, translated from the Greek word Cristos, a translation of the Hebrew Meshiach, or as we say in English "Messiah".
Jesus Christ is the annointed one, the Messiah, Cristos.
by Chris Fedele May 24, 2005
727 512
 
6.
The Son of the living God.

When Jesus asked his disciples who people say he is,

Mathew 16:16 - Simon Peter answered, "You are the Messiah, the Son of the Living God." (This was a God inspired response from Peter, and therefore God's own definition of Jesus and is confirmed by Jesus' response, "Good for you, Simon, son of John!...For this truth did not come to you from any human being (or Urban Dictionary), but it was given to you directly by my Father in heaven."
Jesus Christ is the Messiah, the Son of the Living God.
by PSBWTHU December 25, 2009
272 117
 
7.
1)The second most important figure (next to God) in Christianity. In the Bible, the Old Testement takes place before he is born, and the New Testement takes place after.

2)An exclamation of anger. According to Christianity, you aren't supposed to say the Lord's name is vain, so it's considered by some to be a swear word.
1)When we went to Church on Sunday, the priest told us about the life of Jesus Christ.

2)"Jesus Christ, how stupid can you be?!" yelled the teacher at the student who couldn't read.
by Newbia June 22, 2004
678 576