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Father of Science, King of Pwn. Was integral (get it) in the development of Calculus and by extension much of modern Mathematics and Physics. Formulated Laws of Motion, an understanding of gravity and also noted some interesting stuff about light. Went to Trinity College Cambridge and possed a still largely mysterious power over apples. The unit of force is also named after him.
Hey an apple just fell on my head, DAMN THAT NEWTON!!

If Isaac newton touches a body of mass 1 kg it will begin to move with an acceleration of 1 metre per second squared.

Newton was strolling down the beach and found a pebble; on it was written "F = ma".

by Javal April 26, 2008
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An item in motion stays in motion unless acted on by an outside force. As you may already know, outer space is empty. When you fire a slug from an Everest-class dreadnought, it accelerates to 3% to 3.3% of the speed of light and impacts with more force than the city-buster dropped on Hiroshima. That slug will not stop until it hits something - be it the ship you're supposed to be aiming at, an asteroid, or a planet on the other side of the galaxy. You are ruining someone's day somewhere at some point in time. For this reason, ISAAC NEWTON IS THE DEADLIEST SON-OF-A-BITCH IN SPACE!
by Zero Beat October 25, 2011
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So you're fucking a girl in an apple orchard and she's got her back up against a tree. Then you really start taking down to pound town, so much so that apples fall from the tree and hit her on the head.
Dude, I went apple picking with my girlfriend's family, but she and I went off on our own. Long story short, I ended up giving her an Isaac Newton.
by fingas-in-butts October 16, 2010
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Christian scientist who created calculus and "discovered" gravity. Atheists, conveniently like to ignore that he was a devout religious person who called atheism "senseless and odious to mankind".
"Opposition to godliness is atheism in profession and idolatry in practice. Atheism is so senseless and odious to mankind that it never had many professors." ~ Isaac Newton on how atheists still practice worship (many atheists today worship celebrities or money in place of God) and how it lacks professors (which is still the case today as atheism is still the minority).
by RationalTruth August 28, 2014
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5
(Issac Knew a Ton) The ingenious- satanic tyrant who discovered gravity and doomed the lives of high school physics students. He is the sole creator of hell known as Newtons Laws and endless mental torture . His accomplice is the infamous apple that dropped on his melon sized brain, and thus it shall also be blamed for tearing out the brains of any teenager who was simply trying to enjoy physics. Issac is the demon himself.
"I wish the apple had dropped on Isaac Newton's head at a greater F=ma, and killed him."
via giphy
by COmmunistTrump April 12, 2017
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