A state struggling to keep the stereotypes of Georgia, South Carolina, Alabama and Mississippi away.
The truly country parts of Florida are the panhandle and central Florida, Northeast and South Florida may be cool.
Florida is also a state of political disbalance being presumed as a red state, Bush stole the election by rigging Floridian votes thus fuckin' the country up.
In short Florida is a "northern" state located in the south with the south rubbed in it.
Snow bird 1: Man I'm flying to Florida this weekend I know it's warm down there!
Snow bird 2: Winter in new England don't make no since.
by Danny Mattherson January 31, 2014
Florida is a beautiful place, the weather and beaches are nice. Florida is really weird though, there are a few nice cities, and then there is boring redneck land. Places like Brevard County, where I live, lack culture. Also, there are too many rednecks and old people with IQs below 90 for my taste, and unfortunately they are eligible to participate in the democratic process. As a result the state that is supposedly a blue state, has 15 Republicans, and only 10 Democrats in the House of Representatives. Florida also has a Republican governor named Charlie Crist who wants to run for Senate in 2010. Although some speculate Charlie Crist is a homosexual, he is still popular among rednecks and old people who are usually homophobic. If you are looking to live somewhere where your children can receive probably the worst public school education in the U.S., your best best right now might be Florida. Governor of Florida Charlie Crist isn't worried about education, he's more concerned with getting the redneck and old person vote to further his career. Even though Charlie Crist admits to recreational marijuana use, Charlie Crist has signed legislation making Florida marijuana prohibition laws more harsh than those of the federal government. Charlie Crist has also approved of Jesus license plates for the state of Florida. You might've seen the governor of Florida on the news because he wants to run for senate, and they might call him a moderate Republican. In my opinion, governor of Florida Charlie Crist is a Sarah Palin/Rush Limbaugh breed of Republican. The only reason they say Charlie Crist is a moderate Republican, is because he liked the idea of getting stimulus money from Obama. Charlie Crist probably wants that stimulus money so he can lock up more non violent drug offenders and print lots of Jesus license plates. I would enjoy Florida alot more if the Republicans got voted out, and the rednecks would stop spawning with their sisters.
Me: So many tax dollars are wasted on incarcerating non violent drug offenders. Don't you think it would be better to use that money for education?

Redneck Republican: Well, I reckon to save money lockin up them druggies and feedin em, we should just give them the death penalty. Give the death penalty to queers too.

Old lady: A college student had 21 grams of that dangerous drug marijuana on him, luckily here in Florida that's a felony. Now he can't vote in a democrat, he lost his scholarship, and he'll be in prison for 5 years. I feel safer.
by FloridianWithIQOver90 May 11, 2009
5% amusement parks
3% beaches
92% Rednecks
"I went to Florida this summer!"
"Really? What part?"
"The 3%. The part that doesn't suck."
by Mnoel September 10, 2008
Where your grandparents live.
Grandpa: "Son, guess what"
Son: "Hmm"
"We're moving to florida"

by Joey B.. April 01, 2008
The biggest dick in the U.S. Up north are the Rednecks and down low are the Cubans. Neither, of which you want to live with.
Guy 1: Florida is a dick, man.

Guy 2: I know, right!
by The I.R.A. November 25, 2010
It’s like living in a great big Wal-mart!
Florida Wow, Florida It’s like living in a great big Wal-mart!
by D.Reiner January 10, 2011
How to describe Florida:

Old people driving 5mph to either Publix or Walmart, over-priced tourist attractions, a new child molester case on the news every day, snowbirds galore, a new cockroach somewhere every day as well, stupid politicians, 20 hurricanes every season, FCAT, emo/scene kids, hot weather with humidity to match.

One thing I do love about living here the last 8 years are the skies, flowers, and beaches... unless they're infested with tourists and fat hairy transvestites in speedos. Gross.

Also see Hell.
Old Man visiting Florida: look at the lively youth! playing with their water guns...

Old Woman visiting Florida: LOOK, HONEY! A BINGO HALL COMBINED WITH A WALMART! *slams brakes*
by sarahSANITY June 01, 2007

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