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1. Dry as a Jacobs' cream cracker
(Expression) the opposite of 'as wet as an otter'; when a woman is not sexually aroused. She's so dry, it's like when you have a mouth full of Jacobs' cream cracker (rather nasty!)
oooh, that Charlie from Eastenders, he's so fat and grotesque, when I see him, i'm as dry as a Jacobs' cream cracker!

Cheers for the idea Claire
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