Crypt Keeper

The host of Tales From The Crypt, and an icon to methheads everywhere.

I had to go to Wal-Mart, unfortunately, and I saw three burnt-out motherfuckers who look like they could be the Crypt Keeper's cousins.

by MUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDAMUDA September 17, 2009

Crypt Keeper

Female so old and decrepit that she resembles the very route of all evil.

Man check out that Crypt Keeper !

Dude yeah, Dianne Feinstein is straight evil, she's straight Crypt Keeper status.

by SurferWordSmithy March 1, 2018

Crypt Keeper

A stripper that is obviously past her prime, that makes you ask yourself why is she still stripping. Usually defined by the undead look in her eyes and kinda looks like an old crone or hag even after make up. There's usually one in every club but there's always exceptions.

Holy shit dude how old do you think that one is?

I dunno man she's gotta be the crypt keeper here.

by pseudotramp December 31, 2014

crypt keeper

A state of being so unpresentable that you look like death itself. Typically characterized by no make-up, greasy hair, and feelings of extreme ugliness.

Jen: hey! wanna go shopping?

You: yeah give me an hour though. i just got out of bed and i look like a f*cking crypt keeper

by Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeehe September 5, 2011

crypt keeper

the hilarious, creepy, and all around cool host of "tales from the crypt"

The crypt keeper is the shiznit.

by Adrian September 16, 2006

crypt keeper

After- dark booty call. Someone you would never be caught out with in puiblic by any of your friends because they are so ugly,nasty..etc..

"Did you see John sneaking over to Felicia's house last night?"

"Yeah I saw him, guess he don't want anyone to know he is fucking that crypt keeper!"

by Funky_Girl November 6, 2007

crypt keeper

That dirty old pervert who sits the entrance of the stage to harass dancers

If that crypt keeper touches me again I am Gunna break off his bony finger and shove it up his ass.

by Ted monster March 7, 2015