by Lancashire Guy November 8, 2007
A very small town in East lancashire. Complete shit hole full of dole dossers and drug addicts so its a smaller more boring version of burnley. Locals have a habit of wearing rose tinted spectacles. They think that just because they finally have an argos and a next that colne is now a diserable place to live. Its not, I lived there for 6 months and was desperate to leave after one week. They built some new flats near the beck. Nice, now you can have a brilliant view of people shooting up from your bedroom window. It always smells of gas around there and the streets are full of dog shit.
by ihateithereinlancashire March 31, 2010
A small town in East Lancashire, famous for its high quality residents, cultural fruitfulness and diversity of activities.
Outside of the main town, the area is generally known for its abundant countryside, which often resembles a quagmire due to it raining for 11 months of the year.
Legends say that during the War of the Roses, Colne was the buffer for which the Yorkies and Lancastrians relied on, mainly because neither wanted to acknowledge the place as belonging to either county. Eventually, Lancashire lost the coin toss and Colne became ‘a Lancashire town’.
Disclaimer: the accuracy of this legend is debatable, as the story has been passed down through generations of beer swilling nutters.
In recent years the town’s population became a test site for the Borg, to analyse whether it would be worth assimilating humanity into the main collective. The experiment was deemed a failure, as the Colne Collective struggled to boot up a Commodore 64. They demoted the test to a ZX81, which promptly blew up.
The nicest thing anyone has ever said about the town is “at least it’s not Nelson!”
Outside of the main town, the area is generally known for its abundant countryside, which often resembles a quagmire due to it raining for 11 months of the year.
Legends say that during the War of the Roses, Colne was the buffer for which the Yorkies and Lancastrians relied on, mainly because neither wanted to acknowledge the place as belonging to either county. Eventually, Lancashire lost the coin toss and Colne became ‘a Lancashire town’.
Disclaimer: the accuracy of this legend is debatable, as the story has been passed down through generations of beer swilling nutters.
In recent years the town’s population became a test site for the Borg, to analyse whether it would be worth assimilating humanity into the main collective. The experiment was deemed a failure, as the Colne Collective struggled to boot up a Commodore 64. They demoted the test to a ZX81, which promptly blew up.
The nicest thing anyone has ever said about the town is “at least it’s not Nelson!”
by hollowfeet June 27, 2014
A small town in North West England. Suffered years of decline, but in recent years has seen regeneration and is becoming a rather desirable place to live. Filled with Burnley fans and the occasional bastard rovers fan, also contains quite a few man united wannabe fans. Historic town which contains a Roman Fort and was a strongholding on the way up to Skipton and eventually, the Roman Capital, York.
by MMCC May 8, 2005
A small town in North West England. Suffered years of decline, but in recent years has seen regeneration and is becoming a rather desirable place to live. Filled with Burnley fans and the occasional bastard rovers fan, also contains quite a few man united wannabe fans. Historic town and contains a Roman Fort and was the last post from London to York under the Roman influence.
by MMCC May 8, 2005
Colne....a quaint west yorkshire village, full of inbreds, dingles & hill-trolls. Just like it`s neighbouring town Burnley, but the gene pool is is much smaller, thus giving way to lots of family-love during the long dark winter nights.
When thinking of Colne, think League of gentlemen....& you won`t go far wrong.
When thinking of Colne, think League of gentlemen....& you won`t go far wrong.
by Dr Fox May 8, 2007
by fuck shit kick May 17, 2017