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Logically, the most important city on the planet Earth, without any competition whatsoever, besides maybe from London. Seeing that New York is an overgrown superhigh-density monstropolis, and Los Angeles being just a sprawling collection of coincidentally nearby suburbs, Chicago also holds claim to the title "The only real city in the United States".

Living Rooms are Front room, Bathrooms are Washrooms, Athletic Shoes are Gym Shoes (there's nothing sneaky about your "sneakers"), Soft Drinks = Pop, and the transit system (The El or "L"), unlike its counterparts in New York and London, actually makes sense. Despite what CNN would like you to think, Chicago is NOT actually the most dangerous city in the Universe, nor is it the murder capital of the United States. Unlike New York, its ugly cousin, housing is reasonably affordable.

Chicago is also home to the most skilled drivers in North America. With its underground streets (wacker drive), habitual (but also skilled) red light runners, and 80 mph (130 km/h) unposted minimum speeds on all expressways (especially the Eisenhower), absolutely impeccable driving skills are required of all residents and visitors. Traffic Jams are almost always caused by drivers that mistakenly view speed limits as maximum speed suggestions, and also by those who swerve dangerously and ungracefully between multiple lanes in a single merge (drivers from wisconsin and minnesota, respectively).

If one says, "Wanna come with?" or "Where's that at?" you are to interpret that as "Do you want to come with me?", and "Where is that?" but you will never say "Wanna come with me?" because that would be weird, ending sentences with prepositions is perfectly acceptable.

Pedestrians are demigods, and have right-of-way in all scenarios. Period. Attempting to run over a Chicago pedestrian would be about as dangerous as attempting to collide head-on with a 18-wheeler semi truck. "Pedestrian rage" is far more prevalent than "road rage", and jaywalking and crosswalk are both equally unknown terms to Chicagoans.

Macy's is regarded as the invasive alien force that ended the amazing quality and customer service Chicago called "Marshall Field's".

Chicagoans find "New York Style Pizza" to resemble oversized pancakes, as opposed to true "Chicago style deep-dish pizza", which, like Marshall Fields, is far superior.

And finally, do not dare criticize a Chicagoans pronunciation of their hometown. There are two acceptable pronunciations (depending on your neighborhood):

Chicago (Shih-kAAH-go) --the "aah" sound is far more pronounced than the east/west coast A. most frequent and stereotypical pronunciation, used by most residents and burbies close to the city.

Chicago (Shih-KAW-guh), less common, found only in some areas of the northside (pronounced norsside), and more frequently among older residents.

Chicagoans will also claim to have a "neutral" and "normal" accent. Do not challenge that claim.
Visitor to Chicago: "Do you ever go to Iowa?"
Chicagoan: "No. That would be silly."
by chicago992 August 24, 2009
The best city in the whole world! The best people come from the midwest, and the best of the midwest is located in Chicago Illinois. This city is not only home to awesome food like pizza and hotdogs, the Sears Tower, Lake Michigan, Six Flags Great America, Woodfield Mall, and the Mag Mile, but it is home to the best people on earth!
There's no place like home - sweet home, Chicago.
by ChitownGirlie July 10, 2008
A kickass jazzy group. Known for their laid back style of music. Potheads get high while they listen to it and rich brats listen to it while they snort their crack. It brings the people together.
Heh, put in that Chicago CD!
by rubywpnmaster June 16, 2004
The largest city in Illinois and the largest by far in the Midwest. America's 3rd largest city, with almost 3 million in the city alone, plus another 5 or 6 million in the rest of the metro area in two other states (Indiana and Wisconsin).

Carl Sanduburg calls it the "city of Big Shoulders," but most people are more familiar with it being the "windy city." This term has nothing to do with meteorology, but came from the city's loud-mouthed politicians boasting about its greatness (which it definately has) during the Chicago World's Fair. Chicago is the cultural, commercial and tranportation center of the Midwest. It has the world's 2nd busiest airport (O'Hare Airport), one of the world's tallest buildings (1,450 foot Sears Tower) and one of the country's busiest freeways (the Dan Ryan and Kennedy Expressways), and the largest hub of the world's 2nd largest airline (United).

Chicago is a great place for young, hip, urban professionals wanting stuff to do, and is a good alternative to living in New York with the lower cost of living. It has all kinds of pro sports teams: 'da Bears, Cubs, Sox, Bulls and Blackhawks. It is so serious about its sports, that a White Sox fan in south Chicago would NEVER walk around this side of town with a Cubs shirt or vice-versa. The city has great museums. The Art Institute of Chicago, the Adler Planetarium, Museum of Natural History and Museum of Science and Industry are the most popular. There are bars all over the place. And there's tons of shopping. The Magnificent Mile on Michigan Avenue is like Canal street in New York. Chicago evens has beaches. Lake Michigan is a great place to swim, sunbathe or people watch in the summer--it's even good for ice fishing.
Chicago is way better than New York anyday. At least the people are more real.
by krock1dk May 23, 2008
The second-hardest thing in the world may be getting a New Yorker to move to Chicago, but the hardest thing in the world is getting him to move back.
New Yorker, on being told he is moving to Chicago: No!

Same guy a year later, on being told he is moving back to New York: NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
by The Chicagoan July 29, 2010
Forget New Nork. Chicago is better! It has everything New York does (including a a large Stock Exchange) except with friendlier people and a more affordable cost of living. Chicago has anything and everything: a better location in the center of the country, culture, quisine (like Chicago Deep Dish Pizza and the Gold Coast Dog), education, mass transit, enormous lakefront, an IVY league university, architecture (Chicago has America's tallest building while New York does not), China Town, shopping- especially on Michigan Avenue, sports teams (dont forget 'da Bears!), the world's 2nd busiest airport, the Chicago Symphony, The Museum of Science and Industry, the Adler Planetarium, the Art Institute and dont forget numerous jobs of all types. Chicago may only be one-third the size of New York but it can kiss Chicago's ass.
Chicago is probably the best major city in the country! Go to hell New York!
by krock1dk September 30, 2007
Home of the greatest Industrial bands and record labels in America. Second only to the Faterland, aka Germany, for greatest Industrial bands in the world.
Many of today's Industrial artists call Chicago home.
by Jon Doe September 09, 2003