A: Did you pick up your vitamins at the health food store?
B: I tried but there was a 'Birkenstocker' following me down every aisle and I had to ditch him.
Sandals worn by liberals, women in Vermont, and for some unknown reason, evangelical youth pastors trying to appeal to young adherents of Christianity.
Pastor Mike has a goatee and wears Birkenstocks--he looks like a pothead for Jesus when in reality his only addictions are online porn and energy drinks.
guy 1: Uhh Uhh... I take r-rubber bands around my t-shirt and stick it in my-
guy 2: Tie Dye?
Guy 1: Yes! Uhh... These are the ugly sandals that lesbians wear
Guy 2: Uhh... Birkenstocks!
*Crowd laughs*