Asspen
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Asspen
an undesirable, selfish male from the famed ski-bum town of Aspen, CO. his main concerns include beer, drugs, and banging you after he causes you to believe he is the answer to your boyfriend prayers. ladies, remember, "the odds are good but the goods are odd."
kate: he was so into me when we were skiing yesterday. i totally thought we connected!
jen: did you bang?
kate: obvi.
jen: girl, he's an asspen! they don't connect!
jen: did you bang?
kate: obvi.
jen: girl, he's an asspen! they don't connect!
Asspen by mightymississippi September 9, 2010
Related Words
asspenis • Asspen • asspensive • Aspen • asspony • asspee • aspen loeffler • Assperger • Asspunk • assenger
Asspen
Another name for a Bradford Pear tree which, due to its pungent aroma when in bloom, smells 'like ass'.
Note that the Bradford Pear is not part of the same family of trees as the Aspen.
Note that the Bradford Pear is not part of the same family of trees as the Aspen.
aspenbergers
Dammit Anna, you've spent so much time writing SQL queries that you're saying stupid stuff like "Aspenbergers"!
aspenbergers by MikaFlo2009 April 25, 2022
Assence
Assence - noun
Any type of odour that contains distinct noticeable characteristics which indicate that the smell originated from the rear end of a person or animal.
The severity of the odour can be of any degree.
"Assence" is formed by merging the words "Ass" and "Essence".
An assence may be the result of: flatulence be it post coital or otherwise, a Rippee, excretion, dogs, pigs or other dirty animals etc....
Any type of odour that contains distinct noticeable characteristics which indicate that the smell originated from the rear end of a person or animal.
The severity of the odour can be of any degree.
"Assence" is formed by merging the words "Ass" and "Essence".
An assence may be the result of: flatulence be it post coital or otherwise, a Rippee, excretion, dogs, pigs or other dirty animals etc....
1: Remember that super hot chick from the dress shop? We had the most amazing date ever last night.
2: And?
1: We get back to her place and had the best sex I have ever had in my entire life, like intergalactic Avatar sex, I blew fireworks all over the wall.
2: And?
1: So afterwards we're lying there, basking in the afterglow when all of a sudden the entire place reeks. It reeks like a sewer in a bad neighbourhood where people only eat Indian food.
2: Now we're talking. Well, there can only be a few possible explanations for this and the first thing that comes to my mind is her vagina. Was it, like, rank dude?.
1: No!
2: That happens to chicks dude, that's why they invented the douche.
1: I thought they invented that so we had something to call you?
2: Very funny…
1: No, I'm just kidding. It wasn't her vagina. I have plenty of experience with rank vagina plus this odour has more of like an Ass Essence to it, an "Assence" if you will.
2: Was it you?
1: No bro, no way, not a chance. First off I never fart with a new chick until like the fourth date, third date maybe. Second off I have never in my life farted the smell of a rotten corpse. I would have to eat the corpse of a dead guy who just ate Indian food and then shit himself in order to fart a smell that bad.
Do you smell that assence?
You can smell an assence if you enter a toilet or restroom after someone had a dump.
Most noticeable in a club/bar or restaurant
2: And?
1: We get back to her place and had the best sex I have ever had in my entire life, like intergalactic Avatar sex, I blew fireworks all over the wall.
2: And?
1: So afterwards we're lying there, basking in the afterglow when all of a sudden the entire place reeks. It reeks like a sewer in a bad neighbourhood where people only eat Indian food.
2: Now we're talking. Well, there can only be a few possible explanations for this and the first thing that comes to my mind is her vagina. Was it, like, rank dude?.
1: No!
2: That happens to chicks dude, that's why they invented the douche.
1: I thought they invented that so we had something to call you?
2: Very funny…
1: No, I'm just kidding. It wasn't her vagina. I have plenty of experience with rank vagina plus this odour has more of like an Ass Essence to it, an "Assence" if you will.
2: Was it you?
1: No bro, no way, not a chance. First off I never fart with a new chick until like the fourth date, third date maybe. Second off I have never in my life farted the smell of a rotten corpse. I would have to eat the corpse of a dead guy who just ate Indian food and then shit himself in order to fart a smell that bad.
Do you smell that assence?
You can smell an assence if you enter a toilet or restroom after someone had a dump.
Most noticeable in a club/bar or restaurant
Assenholen
Assenholen by Dark Night Enforcer January 27, 2015
assponent
A measurement representing the degree to which a woman's skirt hem is higher in the back than the front due to her ghetto booty.
assponent by Rowan Lovecraft July 19, 2006