The impending doom of complacency that one feels upon entering Akron, Ohio. Symptoms include, but are not limited to: immediately feeling like you are morbidly obese and have mobility issues, eating almost nothing but all-American food (e.g., pizza, hot dogs, and hamburgers), thinking that Highland Square is the best or worst neighborhood ever, taking your minor league baseball team way too seriously, reveling the Goodyear/Firestone "glory days," and acting like one of the many sad and unfortunate people who use the public transportation system.
After spending just a few days in Akron, you too will develop the the telltale symptoms of Akron-itis.
by EatMySheet September 20, 2023