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American Gopher Deterrent Technique.

this is a technique that is often used by a man who's property has become infested with gophers.

what you do, is set a gopher trap and capture one of those pesky critters. you then perform a "gopher call" to bring all the other gophers above ground so they can watch. once you are sure they are looking, you drop your pants and anally rape the captured gopher while screaming "you like that?! you like that, gophers?! get the fuck off my property or this is gonna happen to you!"

this technique usually results in 100% of your properties gopher population relocating.

man 1: "fucking gophers keep eating all the shit in my garden!"

man 2: "AGDT 'em man, AGDT 'em."
by feldpar February 17, 2009
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