A person who comes into a room and has to announce their presence by yelling or making some weird animal noises from a cat in heat to a donkey that was fatally stabbed
You're being a real Christian Ortiz right now.
by Shin Godzilla May 21, 2020
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The aromatic combination of Lysol and ass, usually found in a recently occupied restroom facility.
When Hillary entered the ladies room, she was overcome with a Filthy Ortiz.
by Smessler September 16, 2014
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A guy who is a little short. Usually has nice curly hair. He is funny if you understand his humor, if not you might just think he is an asshole. He picks on his sister all the time but it is out of love. Kevin Ortiz is a good friend to have. You can count on him to put a smile on your face.
Dan: damn im so stressed i need to have a good laugh.
Scott: Call kevin Ortiz, he will put a smile on your face
by 9mysterious_anonymous7 December 18, 2017
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Kailee Ortiz is a fat assss slut. She thinks shes hot shit and shes not, she also thinks shes skinnny. a biiiig vagina. everyone deep down inside hates her. she has no real friends. too many haters to count. i reallly hate her. fuuck you stupid bitch.
Kailee Ortiz! thinks she's gorgeous but she is fat and ugly as hell.
by yoooubaaaby(: May 10, 2009
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confuses himself for a woman named Jessica. Likes Rakish and jumping the border (ole). enjoys meme's but who doesn't? HATES weeaboos's, loves bronies, and cant stand isabella.
David Ortiz Salas: I HATE weeaboos's!!!
Weeaboo: *cries*
David Ortiz Salas: let's go jump the border!
Rakish: hell no, you're a bronie!
David Ortiz Salas: NO! IM JESSICA!
by teresacarlisle February 6, 2017
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The explanation as to why Ortiz has no home runs yet. There are two theories.
A)He was a juicer, stopped, and now sucks.
B)He is just too old and fat to hit one.
Guy 1: Why hasn't Ortiz gone deep yet?
Guy 2: He is horrible now that he stopped juicing.
Guy 3: No, he's just too old to hit one.
Guy 1: Ah, the David Ortiz theory in action.
by thebest212 May 12, 2009
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