When you throw your kid in a lake to teach them how to swim and if they start sinking you throw them a non alcoholic beer for being a tosser
Lady: Does anyone have any recommendations for swimming lessons?
James: Just give your kid Irish swimming lessons, it's cheaper and they'll develop psychological disorders when they grow up.
Lady: ....Ok, anybody else have a better recommendation?
James: Just give your kid Irish swimming lessons, it's cheaper and they'll develop psychological disorders when they grow up.
Lady: ....Ok, anybody else have a better recommendation?
by 27DMac July 18, 2019
the dirty swim team is a sex act mostly performed by men, it involves the man defecating into swim goggles and then forcing the woman to wear them for 3-4 days the after the 4 days when her eye is completely diseased,the man fucks her eye until it falls out which the woman must then consume covered in the mans cum
Todd: Hey john what happened last night with Karen?
John: I started a dirty swim team on her a few days ago and finished it last night.
John: I started a dirty swim team on her a few days ago and finished it last night.
by bennyboy6999 May 23, 2015
Swim practice is where your coach constantly yells at you to go faster when you are already at your limit, You can't see on backstroke because of the blinding sun, you hit hands with people on freestyle and butterfly, you practically go no-where in breaststroke... picture that holding your breath.
Leah: "wanna hang out today?"
Me: "sorry I have swim practice"
Leah: "what about tomorrow?"
Me: "sorry boo I still gotta go to practice"
Me: "sorry I have swim practice"
Leah: "what about tomorrow?"
Me: "sorry boo I still gotta go to practice"
by Swimmer288 July 7, 2017
When your indoor pets scratch their nasty asshole on your carpet.
Forearms pulling while backlegs off the ground so b-hole is smack on carpet. Looks like pet is swimming when actually is just scratching or wiping its ass.
Forearms pulling while backlegs off the ground so b-hole is smack on carpet. Looks like pet is swimming when actually is just scratching or wiping its ass.
by StinkyMinkey October 3, 2023
Code for organizing your friends to go into the other room to partake in illicit substances out of the watchful prying eyes of herbs. See “hanging a picture”.
I heard they’re showing synchronized swimming on tv. Have you seen how amazing it is? Let’s go where it’s quiet and watch it on tiktok with me.
by DrunkBabyLion August 4, 2022
Yo man did you meet the girls from ducks swimming?
Yeah, they were the best! I wish I was cool enough to join.
Yeah, they were the best! I wish I was cool enough to join.
by awwwhyeeeee January 2, 2011
Edina Swim Club is a swim team that honors people who are different and special. Many people there are on their way to becoming Olympians.
by Andrew Candler November 16, 2018