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Why do I find it funny?

Oh! You don't get it? My symptoms got worse 2 years ago. I have been in agony for the past 2 years. I was in genuine cognitive decline for about a month or 2 before I started using this very specific brand of generic mouthwash which ameliorated my symptoms, yet... The pressure in my skull persists...
Hym "So why do I find it funny? What have you been doing this whole time? Well, I'll tell you what you've been doing for the last 4 years and in the words of our much beloved Megyn Kelly 'Watching me suffer.' From the aforementioned affliction that I suspect has something to do with the hole in my tooth. Agony and discomfort for years. You WANTED that to be the case. And now your colleague got shot and APPARENTLY... I have no choice but to be sympathetic. Right? Not allowed to be sympathetic to the shooter. Have to be sympathetic to the person that fucked him instead of me. IF I DIE TOMORROW... Are you going to enforce that same sympathy mandate? 'I guess he was ill!' Where were you up until then? PRAYING on my downfall. Yet I remain and he does not. God clearly likes me better. If I die tomorrow would you even say anything about it? Give me in death what you denied me in life? Get the fuck outta here! Where's the money Piers? Billion Dollars off The Joker so confident it would succeed took a success contingent payout. It's going somewhere. While I sit here and rub my jowls to try and milk the blood through my skull so I can feel like I'm not actively about to have a stroke for a couple of minutes."
by Hym Iam September 29, 2025
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Find My

the thing that actually doesn’t help you find your phone
Yo! Chase! Have you heard my phone going off?
Chase: no, why?
You: well, i turned Find My on and it isn’t fucking working!!!!!!
Chase: reasonable crash-out
by whatdahaillllll February 27, 2025
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find your inner love

go f**k yourself
You can all go find your inner love!

You can all go screw yourselves!
by Euu2703 July 15, 2021
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Cellu-find

The act of calling some one else misplaced cell phone in order to find it
My wife always misplaces her cell phone and I always have to cellu-find in order for it to ring so we can find it
by Jimbo25 April 3, 2009
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I can't find it

Something you say to your mum when you can't find something, moments before she instantly out of nowhere finds it.
Timmy: Mum? I can't find it.
Mum: *does magic shit, before summoning it out of thin air.* SEE I FOUND IT UR DUM-ASS EYES
by crazedLunatic May 9, 2022
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