Dumpster Mattress Blowjob

The act of receiving a less than stellar blowjob from some rando life coach behind a dumpster on top of a mattress after bar close.

Life Coach: Hi dude I never met before 10 minutes ago! Want to cuddle on this perfectly good mattress that was thrown away?
Dude: Ummm, ok.

(Both lie down together)
Life Coach: Want to make out?
Dude: Sure why not?
(Proceed to make out)
Dude: Hey you're not bad with your tongue.
Life Coach: You have no idea! Would you like a dumpster mattress blowjob!?
Dude: Yolo

by Cockopotomous January 10, 2018

mattress mommy

Similar to a pillow princess. It makes her lover/baby happy to please his/her mommy with out need for reciprocity. Often with lots of instruction and rewards like with a dom/sub relationship.

I love to make my mattress mommy happy.

by synsmommy March 16, 2015

Fast Mattress

Getting laid as fast as possible.

If you want some fast mattress you gotta use Tinder.

by jSalty January 12, 2019

foam mattress

The best type of mattress hands down. Much superior to spring mattresses. Nothing can compare to a foam mattress when it comes to comfort. However when you buy a foam mattress you are also making the statement that sexy time isn't reserved in the bed anymore, this is more of a pro than a con really (vanilla sex = booorinng).

Jane and dane decided to get a foam mattress and did not regret it one bit. However it was impossible to fuck on it, so they did it on the floor instead.

by Mary Mary Quite The Contrarian May 7, 2021

mattress nips

nipples, which once pressed down, resurface and rise to average nipple height similar to memory foam

dude 1: "damn, yo bitch got sum sleep number lookin ass nips!"
dude 2: "yeah she has them mattress nips that rise, like yeast brother!"

by iusedtobeafish March 3, 2019

St. Mattress

worship from bed, usually very loud "OH GOD" repeated a lot

them: religious preference?
me: st. mattress...it's very exclusive!

by thatnoodlyappendage January 1, 2012

mattress music

Mattress Music is music you have sex or dance to.

Mattress Music is Jeremih birthday sex or Bedrock.

by _Tookié_ May 5, 2016