the entity who dwells in one's toilet and steals the turd before one has a chance to check it out before flushing
you've just plopped this massive log in the john; you stand up, turn around and look down to behold your achievement and ... the damn turd burglar already swiped your poop ... there's nothing in the shallow water.
by aline November 17, 2003
Elton John is a turd burglar!
by psycho bitch March 16, 2004
A toilet where your turds disappear rather than float or rest on the bottom, before you have a chance to look at them, leaving a very unsatisfied feeling.
by Ross Caldwell November 7, 2003
by Mark Ries May 16, 2005
by Bumkicker Slade May 10, 2005
n. A tiny man who, at night, commits a breaking and entering into your buttocks and then into the turd bank to steal all the turds he can conceal in his mouth. He exits quietly and unnoticed.
Oh man! My lucky turd was stolen from my turd bank last night! Mr. Marley, the security guard, should have stayed later! That damn turd burglar!
by Gnome from the Town of Chirps December 31, 2009
Someone who comes and robs your house while you're taking a shit and there's nothing you can do about it because you're takin' a shit
by SUNY POTSDAM September 15, 2005