Kalens are very extraordinary and one of a kind. They are usually very fruity and like to mess around. They often resemble some type of animals, such as turtles. The tolerance for gays are usually as small as his dick, but don't let them trick you as they are hiding something about their sexuality from you ;). They usually like to change their hairstyle often and are very quirky.
Frank: Damn who was that guy you were talking to?
Lisa: Some guy called Kalen, he's very quirky.
Frank: I want to be like a Kalen!
Lisa: Some guy called Kalen, he's very quirky.
Frank: I want to be like a Kalen!
by Peter File ;) July 19, 2022
When you sneeze after eating some nasty ass cafeteria pizza and the projectile of snot that comes out of your nose literally covers your Michael Jordan t-shirt sleeve in nose shit and everyone leaves the table. And then this stupid ass arab doesn't get that someones shirt just got 9/11'd on with boogies.
by Shraban Baishnab September 24, 2011
Kalen is the type of guy with the longest wood that could pattern tomiwa any day and all of the Nansen know
by Shmuck25 August 26, 2019
by Spagetti Meetballs January 13, 2010
a dirty kalen is when you masturbate with hand sanitizer inside a Big Lots while prank calling a local Pet Smart asking if you can raw titty fuck a albino toned gerbil. After you hang up you ejaculate aggressively to a obese anteater with multiple pounds of explosive matter inside their rectum, once your semen reaches the explosive matter WW3 will be started due to the explosive reaction caused.
by Fortniehawk February 18, 2023
While fucking your partner, take out your dick and insert a roast chicken instead. This move takes a lot of skill and is reserved for only the elite Kalens
by Troller937 May 4, 2020
a dirty kalen is when you ask your nearest petsmart if you can titty fuck a albino toned gerbil while masturbating to a constipated anteater with multiple 10 pound casing C4s strapped inside your rectum.
by Fortniehawk February 18, 2023