Crumpets and tea is a British food, usually eaten for breakfast or afternoon paired with tea often. It is made from flour, milk or water and yeast.
Friend 1: Hey bruv you wanna come over and have some crumpets and tea mate?
Friend 2: what kind of bloody question is that? Of course I do!
Friend 2: what kind of bloody question is that? Of course I do!
by sex minister April 27, 2022
by Jack sparky October 22, 2023
by token emo April 7, 2022
by Toshir0z January 13, 2015
Dropping a juicy, ripe, musky turd in the gym steam room, cranking the heat and then heading for the showers.
It was as if a demon had sucked the air out of old Dorian’s lungs when he stepped into the steam room and was over come by the vaporous fog of Cedric’s steamed crumpet.
by Dick Onchin February 6, 2023
The act of a woman or person with a clitoris masturbating while laying face down.
Named after Netflix's Sex Education character Aimee, who is shown doing this in Season 1. Afterwards, she tells friends: “I’ve been wanking all night; I ate four packets of crumpets, and I think my clit might drop off."
Crumpeting is the preferred masturbation position of many people because it puts pleasurable weight and pressure on the genitals. There is also a feminist element to the celebration of crumpeting, in that a lot of porn designed to cater to the male gaze shows women wanking on their backs, legs splayed wide so that men can see everything; in reality, plenty of women prefer touching themselves in ways that are less about performing for others and more about genuinely pleasuring themselves.
Named after Netflix's Sex Education character Aimee, who is shown doing this in Season 1. Afterwards, she tells friends: “I’ve been wanking all night; I ate four packets of crumpets, and I think my clit might drop off."
Crumpeting is the preferred masturbation position of many people because it puts pleasurable weight and pressure on the genitals. There is also a feminist element to the celebration of crumpeting, in that a lot of porn designed to cater to the male gaze shows women wanking on their backs, legs splayed wide so that men can see everything; in reality, plenty of women prefer touching themselves in ways that are less about performing for others and more about genuinely pleasuring themselves.
"Crumpeting is my favourite way to reach orgasm. I like to lay on top of my vibrator with the duvet pulled over me, all cosy."
by CanCanOfWorms September 26, 2023
UK old woman who sits around eating crumpets and flirting excessively online in chatrooms with anyone who will talk to her.
by Goonie's Revenge September 23, 2023