"Did you check our numbers, for the Newfie Retirement Fund?"
"Ya. And we didn't win. So we can't retire this week."
"Ya. And we didn't win. So we can't retire this week."
by D. Gould January 8, 2007
When a male ejaculates too soon in his parters anus/vagina, leaving a tremendous amount of cum that ends up clogging the entire hole up thus ending in early retirement. Once the anus or vagina is clogged up with jizz you are fucked my friend because you're cock can't go in!
Last night Romeo and Juliet were fucking but it all ended in tragedy after that bitch went into early retirement.
by topmountain August 15, 2010
by KurtCoBAE May 28, 2015
An action movie cliche in which a character in an action film mentions wanting to do something peaceful after a mission/encounter only to die in the film.
Did that guy in the movie say he wants to marry his girlfriend after the war? Yep, he's got two days till retirement!
by DANfan January 20, 2013
When you fail to save and invest enough money for retirement and grow too old or get sick and can no longer work to earn money to maintain the lifestyle you are accustomed to. The .44 Magnum Retire Plan may be an option for you! Just place a loaded, high powered firearm to the side of your head or in your mouth and pull the trigger. All your retirement worries will disappear in an instant!
Clarence: “Hey Lance, how is your retirement portfolio looking?”.
Lance: “It’s strong to quite strong”.
Clarence: “Nice! You must have gotten in early on some wireless I.P.O.’s and made a killing!”.
Lance: “No. Truth be told, I haven’t saved or invested shit towards retirement. I’m 68 now and in failing health. I’m on the .44 Magnum Retirement Plan!”.
Lance: “It’s strong to quite strong”.
Clarence: “Nice! You must have gotten in early on some wireless I.P.O.’s and made a killing!”.
Lance: “No. Truth be told, I haven’t saved or invested shit towards retirement. I’m 68 now and in failing health. I’m on the .44 Magnum Retirement Plan!”.
by E. Barlow June 22, 2021
Turn 18. Make a back injury/psychiatric disability claim with SSI. Sell weed and narcotics out of you trailer for extra income. Treat the emergency room like a doctors' office for your many abscesses you will get from injecting drugs. Have many kids you can't afford for the tax advantages. Never work, act entitled the rest of your life while taxpayers with real jobs support your lifestyle. Oh, and have a bunch of tattoos but claim your afraid of needles when it's time to get a life saving antibiotic IV while on vacation in the Hyatt ..(the hospital).......
Hey Craig, hows Matt doing these days? I think hes been working on his 401(A) : The Appalachian retirement plan.
by BLACKHEATHER December 20, 2018
Just like the Smith and Wesson retirement plan, except now free! Try the blue line retirement plan today! Operators are standing by, the call is free! Why pay for mental health services when lead therapy is only thirty minutes away?!
by assblaster9000420blazebrbkms March 28, 2018