The sexual act in which a man puts 2 eggs in between a woman's breasts(while laying in bed) and then sit on them for a solid 2 - 5 hours with a heating lamp near by and the room temperature very high. Then when he gets up, they should be hot, goey, and sticky. He will then proceed to use this as lube for violent sex afterwards. Then, with some of the eggshells, he will proceed to scrape her nipples until they are a bloody pulp.
Me: Dude, im so nervous...
Friend: Whys that?
Me: Sally wants me to do a Texas Humpty-Dumpty Nipple Splitter....I don't think I can sit still for that long!
Friend: Don't worry you'll be fine bro!!
Friend: Whys that?
Me: Sally wants me to do a Texas Humpty-Dumpty Nipple Splitter....I don't think I can sit still for that long!
Friend: Don't worry you'll be fine bro!!
by Shank0potomis August 1, 2012
Get the Texas Humpty-Dumpty Nipple Splitter mug.by Kirbo the man September 26, 2019
Get the DUMPTY HUMPTY BUMPTY RUMPTY AAAa mug.A physical act where upon the chef places an egg inside their rectum and cracks it with the sphincter allowing only egg white to drip upon the desired surface.
by Nabc February 24, 2024
Get the Humpty dumpster mug.Noun. Refers to an amputee with serious anger problems, to the point where their presence causes everybody around them to not have a good time and lose their buzz.
Man with no legs sits in wheelchair, angry: I fucking hate this place. Fuck all of you motherfuckers.
Nearby bystander, listening to the amputee bitch and bitch and can't take it anymore: Shut the fuck up, Humpty-Stumpty. Maybe you just got off on the wrong, uh, "foot." Maybe you have a, ya know, "leg up" on the competition. You look like you're a bit, uh, "stumped." Wow, I really put my, uh, foot in my mouth there. Sometimes you just have to take things one, um, ya know, "step" at a time. Stop being such a fucking buzzkill before I tip over your wheelchair and light your bitch ass on fire. Okay, Humpty Stumpty?
Nearby bystander, listening to the amputee bitch and bitch and can't take it anymore: Shut the fuck up, Humpty-Stumpty. Maybe you just got off on the wrong, uh, "foot." Maybe you have a, ya know, "leg up" on the competition. You look like you're a bit, uh, "stumped." Wow, I really put my, uh, foot in my mouth there. Sometimes you just have to take things one, um, ya know, "step" at a time. Stop being such a fucking buzzkill before I tip over your wheelchair and light your bitch ass on fire. Okay, Humpty Stumpty?
by Jack-the-stripper-ripper March 25, 2024
Get the Humpty Stumpty mug.In interface development, the act of taking a shitty, broken, shattered visual design, data model, or prototype and putting it back together to form some sort of pristine fuckin' egg to serve up to the user.
by MangoBonespurs October 17, 2018
Get the humpty-fuck mug.by Taco Tea Co. May 19, 2006
Get the humpty ass mug.When you hump a girl presumably your date, then proceed to shit all over the bed, and make her clean it up.
Jack "Bro Natalie is a freak bro she wanted me to humpty dumpy her"
Steve"So did you??"
Jack "Hell yea bro"
A humpty dumpty is when you have sex with a girl then proceed to shit all over the bed.
Steve"So did you??"
Jack "Hell yea bro"
A humpty dumpty is when you have sex with a girl then proceed to shit all over the bed.
by Reese98 May 3, 2021
Get the HUMPTY DUMPTY mug.