The sexual act in which a man puts 2 eggs in between a woman's breasts(while laying in bed) and then sit on them for a solid 2 - 5 hours with a heating lamp near by and the room temperature very high. Then when he gets up, they should be hot, goey, and sticky. He will then proceed to use this as lube for violent sex afterwards. Then, with some of the eggshells, he will proceed to scrape her nipples until they are a bloody pulp.
Me: Dude, im so nervous...
Friend: Whys that?
Me: Sally wants me to do a Texas Humpty-Dumpty Nipple Splitter....I don't think I can sit still for that long!
Friend: Don't worry you'll be fine bro!!
by Shank0potomis March 16, 2012
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In interface development, the act of taking a shitty, broken, shattered visual design, data model, or prototype and putting it back together to form some sort of pristine fuckin' egg to serve up to the user.
"Let me get this straight. You want me to humpty-fuck that shit into something usable?"
by MangoBonespurs October 17, 2018
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A relatively young term, emerging from the slang terms for Wednesday (hump day) and the act of discarding one's partner. Thus, Humpty Dumpty can be defined as a breakup on a Wednesday.
bitch: Hey girl, how's you and Mark?
hoe: Well... Humpty Dumpty.
bitch: Oh nooo then we have to get you laid this weekend
by CUMbova December 18, 2018
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Person:have you seen Shea kearns

Person 2: Aye head on him like Humpty Dumpty
by Crt November 26, 2022
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When a someone is humping someone from the behind, and then carefully proceeds to take just the biggest dump on them. And I mean Taco Bell levels of crap, straight on the body. This could be intentional, but is usually accidental
Dude, how was sex last night?

Bro, I totally gave her the Humpty Dumpty last night!
That was totally sick!
by Gayvid2006 January 12, 2022
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