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Texas Humpty-Dumpty Nipple Splitter

The sexual act in which a man puts 2 eggs in between a woman's breasts(while laying in bed) and then sit on them for a solid 2 - 5 hours with a heating lamp near by and the room temperature very high. Then when he gets up, they should be hot, goey, and sticky. He will then proceed to use this as lube for violent sex afterwards. Then, with some of the eggshells, he will proceed to scrape her nipples until they are a bloody pulp.
Me: Dude, im so nervous...
Friend: Whys that?
Me: Sally wants me to do a Texas Humpty-Dumpty Nipple Splitter....I don't think I can sit still for that long!
Friend: Don't worry you'll be fine bro!!
by Shank0potomis August 1, 2012
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humpty ass

My humpty ass forgot to save my paper and I lost it when my computer crashed.
by Taco Tea Co. May 19, 2006
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humpty-fuck

In interface development, the act of taking a shitty, broken, shattered visual design, data model, or prototype and putting it back together to form some sort of pristine fuckin' egg to serve up to the user.
"Let me get this straight. You want me to humpty-fuck that shit into something usable?"
by MangoBonespurs October 17, 2018
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Humpty Dumpty

A relatively young term, emerging from the slang terms for Wednesday (hump day) and the act of discarding one's partner. Thus, Humpty Dumpty can be defined as a breakup on a Wednesday.
bitch: Hey girl, how's you and Mark?
hoe: Well... Humpty Dumpty.
bitch: Oh nooo then we have to get you laid this weekend
by CUMbova December 18, 2018
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Humpty Dumpty

Had sex
by Miles kay June 5, 2019
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Humpty Dumpty

by ISmashRatchets August 8, 2019
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