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Autoblumpkin 

When you're taking a shit, and you give yourself a blowjob at the same time.
"Last night I was taking a huge dump, right? So to ease the pain a little bit, I gave myself an autoblumpkin. Best shit ever.
Related Words

auto-blumpkin 

Everyday at 5:00 PM Tom gives himself a salary auto-blumpkin at work.
auto-blumpkin by milfhunter37 November 3, 2003

Auto-blumpkin 

The act of fellating oneself whist simultaneously taking a deuce
"Why is Ian taking so long?"

"Dude, it's an auto-blumpkin yo"
Auto-blumpkin by automblumpkinitis January 19, 2008