someone who is completely ridiculous and tries to fit in with the trends, however misses the cool factor by the fact they're just not ment to be down with the kids. Like a potato in a mans speedo, - a potato hammock, so uncool.
"OMG have you seen Tyler over there, omg he's trying to down a pint of cider"
"Oh dear he's choking"
"This is so embarrassing! He's such a potato hammock. Cringe."
An absorbent item worn by a woman while she is menstruating, recovering from vaginal surgery, for lochia (post birth bleeding), abortion, or any other situation where it is necessary to absorb a flow of blood from a woman's vagina.
Big Lady had a very heavy period that evening and the Barbie Hammock she had borrowed from her daughters dolls house simply wasn't sufficient to plug the flow from the barn doors.. So she grabbed Dave's Ushanka hat and unceremoniously stuffed it in the stench trench in full view of the other guests..
1. A word used to describe a person with limited social skils or is an otherwise undesirable individual from a personality standpoint. It can be used interchangeably with words like asshole, fuckbucket, shitpurse, tool, numbnuts, etc.
2. A male who is able to attract beautiful women but chooses to hook up with flatsos and other fat broads.
1. What the hell? Who's the hamfucker that upper decked my toilet?
2. Q. Why is Bob with that chick? She's a bitch, she's fat and he can do so much better. A. He's a hamfucker, that's why.
3. News Anchor: "In local news, an unidentified male is in police custody for indecent exposure and lewd conduct involving a canned ham at a supermarket..." Witness on camera: "...I saw him open a can of ham and then, well my children started crying..." News correspondant: "...that's disturbing news...back to you Jim..." News Anchor: "that's one sick hamfucker; sports is coming up after the break..."
A tricky sex act whereby a blow job receiver, after copping a saltyload of man love, and prior to swallowing, withdraws the member slowly from their mouth creating a white hanging stream of 'nut goo' between the bottom lip and the 'eye of the storm' resembling a hammock. Those with additional prowess, and controlled suction, can perform the 'retractable hammock' which involved sucking in the spanned length of the hammock at such a speed that it doesn't hit the chin, almost an impossibility.
"Dude you're such a fag, you love giving a salty hammock"