The ancient, lost Book of the Stupid. Written and given over to humanity by He-Who-Is-Unutterably-Dense. The tome was bound in the skins of ancient bananas. Legend tells us that only the greatest idiots
may open its covers without losing every iota of intellect they ever bore. The mind of any other will be blasted to drivel. Fortunately, this leaves most of planet
Earth's current inhabitants perfectly safe.
The Moronicon
may be opened by the utterance of three magic
words, spoken in any order, but these
words are so stupid that the author has given you the benefit of the doubt and spared your intellect (as it were).
A: "Oh
look, it's the fabled Moronicon! Wonder what it says... gggghhhhhhhh *Drool*"
B: "Right, you
may not be dead, but that deserves a
Darwin Award."