1 definition by vindex

Top Definition
Batman is a super hero dressed in black spandex, a cape, a mask and a tool belt. He fights crime with his sidekick "Robin." Batman's real identity is that of Bruce Wayne, a millionaire/billionaire (depending upon the decade) who tragically lost his parents in some, presumably, horrible accident. (who really gives a shit about the specifics) In addition, Batman is the only gay superhero, often sodomizing, either forcefully or with consent, his pant-less, much younger "friend and sidekick" Robin. It is rumored also that his butler, Alfred, is involved when "Robin really fucks up on the job" in the "bedroom festivities."

Some of Batman's enemies include the penguin, (Secretly Batman's estranged -- and presumed dead -- father who, before faking his own death by falling into a vat of chemicals, almost certainly molested Bruce as a child) Cat Woman (the woman Bruce almost married before realized he was gay and leaving her at the head of the aisle) and though there are more, the Joker, who in a Bizzare twist is, by some totally inexplicable coincidence, Batman's mother. (also deformed --and with a change of sex -- after falling in a separate vat of chemicals)

Batman/Bruce Wayne's residence is in a giant Mansion in Gotham City (a fictional New York) complete with Bat-Mobile parking, secret underground lair filled with giant glowing screens, flashing lights, and a coffee maker. Additionally there is a BDSM chamber beneath the recreation room.

As in popular cinema:
"-Have you seen the new Batman movie?"
"-No, I heard it was shit."

As in the comic strip:
"Gee Batman, whatever are we going to do about The Joker?"
"I don't know Robin but at least Gotham is safe one night more."

As in a creepy older man living with a teenage boy
"-Oh Robin, why don't you come down stairs to the lair. Alfred and I have a surprise for you."
"-Holly rubber fist Batman!!!"

by vindex June 12, 2008

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