"so this woman stumbles into a bar...and she goes up to the bar, flops down on a stool and yells "TARBENDER!! BRING ME A MARTUNI!" and he is like "ok lady.." and brings her a martini and she slams it back, slams the glass back on the bar and kinda sways there for a minute. after a while she leans forward, slamming her hand down on the bar and yells drunkedly "Tar..TARBEnDER! Tarbender come over here! BRING ME ANOTHER MARTUNI!!" and he is like "okay lady..." and brings her another martini. she slams it back.. sways drunkenly for another few minutes.. after a little while she leans forward on the bar gesturing wildly and then hollers "t...Tarb. TARBENDER!! ...ender..Tarb.. TArBEnDER!!! COME OVER HERE!! Tarbender, you make the WORST MARTUNIS in the WORLD! they gave me heartburn." So the bartender is like "Look lady. First of all its 'bartender' not 'tarbender.' Second, its 'martini' not 'martuni.' And third you don't have heart burn, your tit is in the ashtry."
you are drunk at a bar.. the bartender is far away and ingnoring you (with good reason) so you yell "tarbender! hey tarbender!" (and hope he doen't spit in your beer...)