stephen w. thomas's definitions

Imberhorny

To be chav-like, but from a middle-class setting. The origin is from Imberhorne school, in East Grinstead, where there is a high population of chavs from middle-class surburbia. Year 8 alone is approximately 72% chav, whereas Year 11, despite being a lesser 71.6% chav, has even more in the year itself. The word Imberhorny, is therefore to be like and Imberhorne chav.

'That kid just asked if I was gay.'
'Yeah, but he's Imberhorny, what does he know?'
'Besides, I'm shagging his sister as it is.'
'Ewww! You're so Imberhorny!'

by Stephen W. Thomas May 14, 2005

Splud

A wet spud. Useful for throwing.

A threw a splud at Stan's head yesterday, it squelched.'

by Stephen W. Thomas May 9, 2005

Woodland Bear

A large, round, mammal-like creature, known for his strange dancing and general attitude to life. How wonderful. Woodland Bear lives near the Ashdown Forest, close to his cousin Winnie. Also known as Woodland, WoodyB and Wooders.

Woodland Bear, Woodland Bear,
Is he here?
No, he's there.
Woodland Bear.

by Stephen W. Thomas July 16, 2008

Tree Fairy

The Tree Fairy, also known as the Winter Fairy, brings on the season of winter. The Tree Fairy flys around the world at night, over several weeks late in the year, injecting trees with a special poison. This poison, 'Trisphinxius X' causes, over a short amount of time, the falling off of the tree's leaves. The Tree Fairy works late in the year only, a she takes trips to Bermuda every summer. Legend has it that once upon a time a Norwegian Pine saved the Tree Fairy's life, and as a payment, she has never injected an 'evergreen' since. Hallelujah.

'I am the tree fairy, and I bring you cold, ugly trees!'

by Stephen W. Thomas May 15, 2005

Hedin

Sven Anders Hedin (1865-1952) was one of the great Swedish explorers. He was not the greatest, but was certainly one of them. Hedin was born in Stockholm and educated in both Sweden and Germany. Before he was 21 he started on his first exploration, of his back garden. He then travelled through Mesopotamia, part of which is now known as Iraq. Fascinating. In 1893 he began a 4 year journey across central Asia, looking for the lesser spotted Asian Zebra a friend had told him about. After four years his friend admitted he had lied. During a journey across the Pamir-La-Anderson Mountains his party found several ancient cities, called 'New York', 'Boston' and 'Disneyworld'. From 1927-35 he was in charge of the joint Chinese-Swedish expedition. They found China, but lost Sweden in the act. Which was a shame. I like Sweden. They invented Abba.

Person 1: 'Oh look! I found Jehol: City of Emperors by Sven Anders Hedin!'
Person 2: 'Well, he's an okay Swedish bloke, but I prefer Gustaf Dalen, who revolutionised lighthouse equipment and invented the Aga cooker.'

by Stephen W. Thomas November 7, 2004

crabbage

1) A pincered vegetable.
2) A crab salad.

1) 'I wish I was a crabbage,
I'd play the whole day long,
And although I would have no legs
I'd live inside a thong.'
2) 'One crabbage please, but hold back on the crab. And the salad.

by Stephen W. Thomas May 9, 2005

wondabulous

A mixture between 'wonderful' and 'fabulous'. Used to make your miserable lives just a tad better.

'That steak was wondabulous!'
'Not nearly as wondabulous as the ketchup.'

by Stephen W. Thomas May 13, 2005