stephen w. thomas's definitions

Tree Fairy

The Tree Fairy, also known as the Winter Fairy, brings on the season of winter. The Tree Fairy flys around the world at night, over several weeks late in the year, injecting trees with a special poison. This poison, 'Trisphinxius X' causes, over a short amount of time, the falling off of the tree's leaves. The Tree Fairy works late in the year only, a she takes trips to Bermuda every summer. Legend has it that once upon a time a Norwegian Pine saved the Tree Fairy's life, and as a payment, she has never injected an 'evergreen' since. Hallelujah.

'I am the tree fairy, and I bring you cold, ugly trees!'

by Stephen W. Thomas May 15, 2005

what the monkey

An expression of shock pioneered in West Sussex churches as a way to avoid swearing when surprised. Has now spread and is a general phrase used when shocked. Can be shortened for instant messaging to WTM.

"Johnny, I'm pregnant."
"What the monkey!?"

by Stephen W. Thomas October 12, 2004

Brightonshire

The collective counties of West and East Sussex.

"I went down to Brightonshire the other day. Twas sunny like the windfart.

by Stephen W. Thomas May 9, 2005

fartoholic

Someone who is addicted to their own fart smell, and so farts as often as possible.

'Stan, you're a real fartoholic'
'So?'
'You stink.'

by Stephen W. Thomas May 9, 2005

Comboine Harrrvestorr

a farming implement. Very satisfying to pronounce when said with a Somerset or farmer accent.

"I've got a brand new comboine harrrvestorr."
"Will you give me the key?"
"No."

by Stephen W. Thomas November 10, 2004

Copthorne

the place where the hobbits don't live.

"I'm off to Copthorne."
"Oh, no. You won't find any hobbits there. Try Middle Earth."
"Is that near Crawley."

by Stephen W. Thomas November 10, 2004

The Fast Show

Ha. Hahah. Hahahah. Heee hee ha ha ha!

'Ha. Hahah. Hahahah. Heee hee ha ha ha!'

by Stephen W. Thomas November 10, 2004