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Stupidity

The perpetual trademark of our species. The random and unpredictable state of mind that causes and governs wars, unwanted pregnancies, political actions, divorces, ripoffs, reality TV shows, copycat crimes, cults, self-injury, and lawsuits.
Since the stupid in our midst are breeding uncontrollably while the intelligent minority are dying out, one can easily predict that our stupidity will far outpace our technological progress within a few decades, and propel us back to the Stone Age or extinction with in a few centuries.
You can never go broke by underestimating the stupidity of the human race.
by sarcastic December 13, 2003
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Amway

This pyramid scheme/Multi-Level Marketing cult is also known as Quickstar or Quixtar.

This cult reaps huge profits from making expensive motivational videoes/tapes and numerous seminars which basically try to convince you to purchase even more motivational videoes/tapes. To even make a profit from selling their ridiculously EXPENSIVE product line, you have to already have a shitload of money, preferrably in the hundred$ of thou$and$, which is why they have celebrities and sports-stars promoting their crap.
I made the terrible mistake of attending an Amway/Quickstar seminar last week. 146 minutes of my life wasted listening to a bunch of rich white people preaching religious sermons about how their products will "change your life" if you purchase their motivational crap in order to become even more interested in their cult and their pricey products.
by sarcastic June 20, 2004
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American cheese

Proof that oil and water DO mix after all.

This nasty-tasting, solidified soy oil is used as a substitute for real cheese, which at least has nutrition and is ACTUALLY digestible.
I made the terrible mistake of buying American cheese (hey, it cost half as much as Cheddar). The next day, I woke up with explosive diarrhea because that shit just went right through my digestive tract.
by sarcastic December 17, 2003
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Thanksgiving

Modern Definition: An American tradition where people gorge on turkey until they puke and visit their relatives to eat even more turkey. Usually the stores start to get flooded with Christmas shoppers at this time.

Real meaning: Originally celebrated by the Pilgrims (early north-American settlers) as a remembrance of the time when they took full advantage of the local Native American tribes' knowledge of the land, invited them all over to a feast, slaughtered them all the next day, settled on their land, and looked westward to the vast, unconquered land that lay ahead of them.
I had barbecued pork ribs and fries on Thanksgiving day. To Hell with turkey. (heh heh heh)
by sarcastic November 26, 2003
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Native American

A proud descendent of the first group of humans to settle in the Americas. According to recent archaelogical findings, they migrated from Asia via glacier bridges and sea travel more than 12,000 years ago and within a short time, they branched off into thousands of unique cultures. Sadly, the North American natives were nearly exterminated by greedy and gold-thirsty European settlers who tricked them through the use of treaties, butchered entire cultures in the name of God, raped their women, stole their land, and infected them with smallpox, syphillis, and other deadly diseases. Today, what's left of the North American natives are now either drinking themselves to death on the reservations, or getting their sweet revenge by building casinos.

Although the South American natives were luckier than those of the north, they were mostly converted to Catholicism, forced to speak Spanish, and what little earnings they make are sent to the modern Roman capital known as the Vatican.
Today, the descendents of the European settlers add insult to injury by honoring a holiday called Thanksgiving, which basically celebrates how their ancestors ass-raped and culled back the once widespread Native American population.
by sarcastic November 27, 2003
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Evercrap

That idiot blew his whole paycheck playing that Evercrap game, and he hasn't paid his rent two months.
by sarcastic May 24, 2003
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go away or I will replace you with a simple shell script

A shoddy attempt at humor crafted by the Linux community in order to answer back at those who even mildly criticize their half-finished kernel or the "newbies" who are trying to seek help in getting Linux to function properly on their machines. Makes one look stupid when said out loud in a group of people.
Newbie: Can you please help me configure my soundcard and modem? I read the manual, and followed the instructions, but both piece of hardware still refuse to work.
Linux elitist: Go away or I will replace you with a simple shell script, retard.
Newbie: All I did was ask for help, and if this is how you treat those who want to learn about Linux, then you shouldn't be surprised if people go back to using Windows or Mac OS-X.
Linux elitist: Well go back to crashing your Windoze, troll.
by sarcastic May 29, 2004
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