13 definitions by redheadbass

Top Definition
Baby Cannon

1. A human female of child-bearing age.

2. Vulva, vagina, or entire reproductive system.

A baby cannon is loaded by inserting a primer charge in the barrel (vagina). The baby cannon will fire nine months later, unless there is a baby cannon misfire, or if you unload the baby cannon. It is important to periodically clean the baby cannon. For a period of several days a month, a female whose baby cannon is not loaded experiences a condition where her baby cannon is leaking. The condition can be mitigated by inserting a baby cannon plug. Baby cannons are unique among guns in that the bore diameter increases with age. Baby cannons are usually single shot weapons, but occasionally fire two or more shots, sometimes with a magazine holding up to eight rounds, and firing on full-automatic - see octomom.
"I hear Mike just picked up a baby cannon that's too old and rusty to fire."
by redheadbass January 13, 2013
Drunk. Very drunk. No longer functional in any meaningful way.
Del was so boiled, he yacked in the taxi.
by redheadbass January 22, 2011
I wish she would clean the baby cannon.
by redheadbass January 13, 2013

Works like gaydar, but puts it's results on a scale of 0.0-10.0
That dude tripped off my gaydar, but he only registers 4.6 on the fagometer.
by redheadbass February 14, 2011
Any drunk fucker that requires Jimmy sticks to move about the bar.
That gimpy bastard is going to piss himself if you don't give him his Jimmy sticks back!
by redheadbass January 26, 2011
One that performs sexual intercourse with protective undergarments previously worn by incontinent senoir citizens.
You damn diaper fucker, get out of my trash can!
by redheadbass January 19, 2011
She was knocked up, but she had a baby cannon misfire.
by redheadbass January 13, 2013

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