pbmax's definitions

Evite Exegesis

Analyzing an evite. Despite evites' air of informality, they are often carefully constructed by party planners and thus can be rich with meaning. Nevertheless, it is easy to overthink an evite, whether by incorrectly ascribing intentionality to hastily written remarks, attempting to divine patterns from the ebb & flow of responses, or forgetting to ask yourself the simple question, "Will I have fun?"

No response prompts more evite exegesis than "+ 1 guest."

by PBMax June 13, 2008

Metattle

Someone who reveals that someone else has revealed something. From the Greek meta meaning "after" and the Middle English tattle meaning "tattle."

Vanity Fair metattled on W. Mark Felt's involvement in the Watergate scandal by outing him as "Deep Throat."

by PBMax November 4, 2007

mockward

1) Making a situation more awkward by mocking how awkward it is. The situation need not be awkward in the first place.

Apparently coined by Washington Post columnist Monica Hesse.

2) Mocking someone in an awkward — and thereby probably unsuccessful — manner.

Apparently coined by then-Columbia Journalism Review assistant editor Megan Garber.

Someone asked to define the word "awkward" will often resort to describing the task as "awkward," which is just mockward. When someone does the same with "mockward," it's meta-mockward.

by PBMax May 11, 2008

Pathection

The purest, Plantonic manifestation of being pathetic.

Douglas achieved pathection by choosing to "Reply-All" because he didn't realize most of the recipients wouldn't care about him.

by PBMax April 17, 2008

factorial funny

Reading "!" used for punctuation as if they designated the mathematical function factorial.

LEX: I used Yahoo Factorial to look for Panic Fatorial @ The Disco concerts.
IRA: Since when is the word factorial funny?

by PBMax May 1, 2008

Sighness infection

A mood where you feel like sighing all the time. Usually the "infected" are unhappy, but may also be wistful or any other emotion which produces sighs. Not to be confused with clinical depression, which is more persistent but not necessarily more intense.

May also be called "sighnessitis."

Rubi contracts a sighness infection every time she thinks about how her sister Reema got into Harvard but she didn't.

by PBMax February 24, 2008

finger footsie

An alternate description of holding hands which reinforces its intimate aspects. Used by individuals who are feeling smothered by their significant others.

Whenever Cyriac played finger footsie with Priya, she felt like an animal in steel trap that must gnaw its appendage off to escape.

by PBMax January 9, 2009