od smith's definitions

Hannibal Barca

The greatest military tactician in history, and general of the Carthaginian armies in both Punic Wars against Rome.

Inventor of the pincers movement, pioneered in the Battle of Cannae (216BC), the greatest defeat in Roman military history, and the third of his three great victories over Roman forces (following River Trebia in 218BC and Lake Trasimene in 217BC).

The Carthaginian empire spanned from Tunisia (where Carthage is) through Libya and most of North Africa, Spain, Mallorca, Corsica, Sicily, and Sardinia.

His name also inspired the name of the city of Barcelona, which was once part of the Carthaginian empire.

Alexander the Great may have had the numbers and the massive empire, but Hannibal Barca had the tactics, the better cavalry and ELEPHANTS!!!

by OD Smith August 23, 2007

Dumark

The opposite of a smark: the wrestling fan that cheers for who they're told to, as opposed to wrestlers with far more talent who put on far superior matches, no matter how detrimental to the product that person truly is.

This is especially prevalent in the WWE and TNA - orginisations that thrive on the crowd not thinking for themselves.

"Stop cheering for John Cena, you braindead dumark."

by OD Smith September 29, 2007

Twunt

A word devisted by Planet Sound head honcho John Earls, in a 2/10 review for Boy Kill Boy.

Methinks the word "twunt" is the only way you can get close to calling members of BKB a twat and a cunt without being fired...

by OD Smith December 7, 2009

French military victories

When the French win in battle - which they have done, only Americans won't believe it because they're pissy and moronic, in equal measure.

A list of notable French military victories:
Battle of Allia (387 BC)
Battle of Gergovia (52 BC)
Battle of Soissons (486)
Battle of Tolbaic (496)
Battle of Vouille (507)
Battle of Tours (732)
Battle of Pavia (773)
Battle for Paris (885-6)
Battle of Val-es-Dunes (1047)
Battle of Hastings (1066)
Battle of Dorylaeum (1097)
Battle of Ascalon (1099)
Battle of Montgisard (1177)
Battle of Bouvines (1214)
Battle of Morlaix (1342)
Battle of Ardres (1351)
Battle of Cocherel (1364)
Battle of Montiel (1369)
Battle of La Rochelle (1372)
Battle of Chiset (1373)
Battle of Roosebeke (1382)
Battle of Bauge (1421)
Siege of Orleans (1428-9)
Battle of Jargeau (1429)
Battle of Beaugency (1429)
Battle of Patay (1429)
Siege of Compiegne (1429)
Battle of Gerbevoy (1435)
Battle of Formigny (1450)
Battle of Castillon (1453)
Battle of Agnadello (1509)
Battle of Marignano (1515)
Battle of Ceresole (1544)
Battle of Rocroi (1643)
Battle of Nordlingen (1645)
Battle of Lens (1648)
Battle of Dunes (1658)
Battle of Fleurus (1690)
Battle of Beachy Head (1690)
Battle of Landen (1693)
Battle of Denain (1712)
Battle of Fontenoy (1745)
Battle of Roucoux (1746)
Battle of Lauffeld (1747)
Battle of Hastenbeck (1757)
Battle of Carillon (1758)
Battle of Yorktown (1781)
Battle of the Chesapeake (1781)
Battle of Valmy (1792)
Battle of Fleurus (1794)
Battle of Lodi (1796)
Battle of Castiglione (1796)
Battle of the Bridge of Arcole (1796)
Battle of Diersheim (1797)
Battle of Rivoli (1797)
Battle of the Pyramids (1798)
Battle of Mount Tabor (1799)
Battle of Abukir (1799)
Second Battle of Zurich (1799)
Battle of Marengo (1800)
Battle of Hohenlinden (1800)
Battle of Austerlitz (1805)
Battle of Jena (1806)
Battle of Jena-Auerstedt (1806)
Battle of Friedland (1807)
Battle of Tudela (1808)
Battle of Ucles (1809)
Battle of Ciudad-Real (1809)
Battle of Eckmuhl (1809)
Battle of Wagram (1809)
Battle of Medellin (1809)
Battle of Ocana (1809)
Battle of Smolensk (1812)
Battle of Borodino (1812)
Battle of Dresden (1813)
Battle of Lutzen (1813)
Battle of Vauchamps (1814)
Battle of Ligny (1815)
Battle of Trocadero (1823)
Battle of Navarino (1827)
Invasion of Algeria (1830)
Battle of Balaclava (1854)
Battle of Malakoff (1855)
Battle of Solferino (1859)
Battle of Foochow (1884)
First Battle of the Marne (1914)
Togoland (1914)
Battle of Ypres (1914)
Battle of Verdun (1916)
Battle of Vimy Ridge (1917)
Second Battle of the Marne (1918)
Battle of Belleau Wood (1918)
Battle of Chateau-Thierry (1918)
Battle of Amiens (1918)
Battle of Maysalun (1922)
Battle of Koufra (1941)
Battle of Normandy (1944)
Operation Dragoon (1944)
Operation Desert Storm (1991)
Cote d'Ivoire (2003)

by OD Smith August 24, 2008

ultraspank

California five-piece that had two albums (Ultraspank and Progress) on Sony, before splitting up due to not being simplistic enough to appeal to Middle America.

Shame, since they were rather damn good...even though you got weird looks in HMV when asking for their CDs.

Go on Amazon, for God's sake...

by OD Smith March 29, 2005

Ben Moody

Former guitarist and creative axis of 15-minutes pseudo-goth act Evanescence (remember them?), who left almost as soon as they started selling records by the shedload for the usual "creative reasons" and because he felt unhappy at selling shedloads of records. So he now writes for both Avril Lavigne and Kelly Clarkson - so must feel creativly fulfilled and a lot happier.

"So let me get this straight - Ben Moody spent eight years trying to make something of Evanescence, got bored when they made something of themselves, and decided to write for such legit rock luminaries as Avril Lavigne and Kelly Clarkson?!?"

by OD Smith October 1, 2005

manchester united

Everything that is wrong with modern football - with their Johnny Come Lately fans (from Croydon and Essex, mostly), merchandising empire that makes them more money than on-pitch endeavours, and the greatest bunch of cynical cheating scum you could ever cast your eyes on. Also former home to David Beckham and Eric Cantona, if you needed an easy reason to hate them.

Yet they seem to have one major contradiction - they want to sign any player under the sun (not signing a player courtesy of The Sun, as they usually do), yet don't want Malcolm Glazier and his money that would help them do so.

Pedro Mendes from the halfway line.
Ruud van Nistelrooy winning (another) dubious penalty.
Roy Keane trying to end Alfie Haaland's career.
The players chasing the ref around the pitch when they don't like his decision.
Alex Ferguson pointing to his watch for (even) more stoppage time when they're losing.
Another player from a small club being "unsettled" by the sports pages in The Sun, bullying their club into selling him (ie, Dwight Yorke, Louis Saha)

by OD Smith February 18, 2005