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1.
An absolutly evil database programme, which serves no purpose other than driving you clinically insane at a remarkably quick pace.

Never used in the workplace, so it's ppointless to be taught how to use it in GCSE or A-Level IT.
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHH FUCK!!! Why won't it recognise this goddamn formula like a normal person?!?"
by OD Smith March 29, 2005
 
2.
Pile of rotten garbage. May or may not actually work, but guaranteed to have large piles of rotten excrement tucked away in the corner that will explode when least expected.
Of course it blew up, it's Microsoft Access. Who knows what crap was lurking in it.
by Slacker Bob July 21, 2010