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kerrunk

Kair-Unkkh. n.

The sound made when one reverses an automobile and asks:

"I wonder how close I am to that other car?"

Before saying to oneself "Well, I can't get any closer than that!"
KERRUNK!

"Oh sh*t! A Porsche... now that's going to cost someone a lot of money... Robin old chum, let's exit... to the Batcave!"

From "BatTheft Auto: The Movie" (Pussdog Pictures Inc.)
by Neil Baxter December 28, 2005
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bacon brigade

The Police, modified from the popular term for police, 'pigs'.

The cause of much hilarity, the police have been comedy targets throughout the world for years...

"How many police officers does it take to break an egg?"
"None... the egg fell down the stairs of it's own accord!"

"I always wanted to be a policeman, but I failed the criteria... my mother and father are married."
"Oink Oink... do you smell bacon?"

"What do you mean... oh yes... here come the bacon brigade! Oy streaky!"
by Neil Baxter October 4, 2005
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Dink Dank Doo

Supposedly newly-coined 'Northern' English Catchprase with little or no meaning that is copied and quoted ad nauseum throughout the U.K.

Taken from the character 'Paddy' in the excellent 'Phoenix Nights' and later from the unbelievably dire 'Max & Paddy's Road To Nowhere', this phrase replaced the often uttered "Booyakasha" comment known throughout our septic isle.
"Hey Paddy... I've got two fingers in me Twix... and as I'm quite full, I'll let you have one."

"Oh hey? What a guy! Paddy likes Twixes, Paddy does! You'll 'dink dank doo' for me, me auld flower!"

From: "The Script To Nowhere" (Channel 4)
by Neil Baxter December 28, 2005
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claypole

1.Englishman with a neatly trimmed beard who looks relatively smart, although there's something outlandish in his dress code, such as cowboy boots or a shirt that TOTALLY doesn't match.

2. A drama student or 'wit' who exclaims 'odd bodkins' for no reason.

3. A pole for poking clay with.

Named after Timothy Claypole from the old kid's t.v. show 'Rentaghost'.
"I say Carruthers... look at Smythe there... the suit's definitely Saville Row, but the tie's just GOT to be Primark... what a complete Claypole!"
by Neil Baxter October 4, 2005
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Quidditch

Kwiid-itch, n.

1. Fictional Sport in the 'Harry Potter' novels involving bats, balls, brooms and C.G.I. effects - no doubt to be frowned upon when some daft bugger emulates it and falls to his/her doom on discovering they can't really fly.

2. The type of sneeze that starts in the nostrils, causing one to clamp one's teeth and close the mouth, resulting in sneezing a large clod of snot into one's hand that's in such a vast amount that it can't be wiped onto one's clothing discreetly.
"Quidditch" Ron exclaimed.
"Yeah," said Harry, closing his potions book. "I'm tired of studying... let's go and have some practice before Saturday's match".
Ron looked sheepish and attempted a grin. "Sorry mate" he said red-faced, "I just sneezed... you ain't got a tissue have you?"

from "Harry Potter and the HalfBaked Plot" by K.J. Growling
by Neil Baxter October 12, 2005
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warner

Person who pretends to be a 'Goth' or 'Sweaty' 24/7m but removes all the metalgear and make-up when in the presence of Mom & Pop prior to going out for an evening meal.

Named after Brian Warner a.k.a. Marilyn Manson, who looks TOTALLY DIFFERENT without make-up and contact lenses!
"Did you see Jim the other day in the library? I couldn't believe it - the guy's a REAL Warner!"
by Neil Baxter September 23, 2005
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friglet

The offspring of a pig and a frog... basically the child of Kermit and Miss Piggy.

Also known as a 'frig' or a 'pog'.

The friglet is a delicacy amongst the French (even though they'll basically eat anything) yet is hard to catch: although it's grunts can be heard for miles, the little critter can jump 27 feet at a time, therefore anyone who's ever caught one is often referred to as being 'a lucky frigger'.
"Kermie... I want for us to settle down and have friglets"

"Oh but Piggy... we've gotten low ceilings... surely they'll hurt themselves?"

"Hmm... you're right... forget it... let's just have a zany adventure featuring some famous folks instead!"

From 'Muppet & Muppettability' by Austin Jayne.
by Neil Baxter October 8, 2005
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