4 definitions by mongoose4342

Metrosexuality to the point of borderline homosexuality/femininity. Named for the prevalence of this condition among male employees of the clothing store "Express." As the condition improves the afflicted will move on to other clothing stores, the first step generally being American Eagle, with time and constant teasing the sufferer may go on to one day kiss a girl. Should the condition worsen the sufferer will move on to the Gap or Old Navy and be subjected to random beatings by emo kids looking for tight fitting women’s jeans.
Dude, Arturo is so xpress. We better say something before he gets mugged at the Bright Eyes concert.
by mongoose4342 July 4, 2006
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a single player sport played predominately in public restrooms, generally while at work. The rules are simple. While excused to the restroom to plant a mighty deuce, absolutely no noise can be made. This rule is only in effect while other people are in the restroom. This game is often lost by people who wipe themselves like they are sanding down a book shelf or by people in serious danger of blowing an o ring.
Taco bell is a one way ticket to losing the quiet game.
by mongoose4342 July 4, 2006
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An act that while justifiable will ultimately result in embarrassment. The phrase is derived from the inevitable embarrassment that results from beating the shit out of a midget that is messing with your woman/insulting your honor. To allow him to continue will only lead to the shame of being hassled by a three foot tall circus performer, but knocking his teeth out will lead to looks of shock and disgust from passers by who did not witness the little person's earlier transgression.
So Mr. President, how goes the invasion of that third world nation?

Not good, i really punched a midget on that one.
by mongoose4342 July 17, 2006
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To display an attitude that transcends bitchiness but falls short of C word like behavior. Twattitude is commonly displayed by women (and effeminate men) in office environments. Symptoms include: unnessecary sarcasm, deliberate ineptitude, and douche bag like facial expressions.
Tina needs to retard her twattitude before she gets an upgrade to C-class.
by mongoose4342 October 4, 2007
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