95 definitions by magickdio

Spar-GER; the cheap, bitter, drain-cleaning-fluid-like substance contained within generic white cans and sold as lager at your local Spar. Essentially, it is carbonated tramp piss.
"I've only got £2 to get collins'ed on. Looks like I'd better buy a 12 pack of Sparger"

"He said it was Corona, but it literally took the skin from the inside of my mouth. I'm sure it was Sparger"
by magickdio February 4, 2010
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1) Discarded, half eaten kebabs that are strewn through the streets near bars after 2am at weekends.

2) Oral sex performed on someone in a park/carpark/shop doorway. A person does not necessarily have to be a tramp to perform or receive Tramp Nosh but it is reasonable to assume that at least one participant may be, due to the scabby choice of location.
1) "I can't eat this doner, I'm gonna puke. Do you want it?"
"Nah, throw it down, man. Let it become tramp nosh."

2) Claire regretted her choice to remain sober and be the designated driver as soon as she approached her car and noticed, all too clearly, the gentleman reclining against it, recieving an enthusiastic tramp nosh from a woman in pink pvc and hair glitter.
by magickdio July 7, 2011
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To Hit the high "C" is to make the high pitched noise emitted by a man who has just been injured in the genital area. It's a note easily achieved by choir boys and opera singers, but most men will only ever manage to attain such highs when they've sustained a blow to the bollocks.

To induce this noise in a gentleman, use reasonable force when striking the area. Note- REASONABLE force. Excessive force will result in no sound, as the note emitted will be too high for even dogs to hear, or he'll be unconscious, which is no fun for anyone.
"I accidentally elbowed Finn when I went to grab my handbag off the floor. He really hit the high "c", it was hard not to laugh"

"Ferdinand with a very good interception cleanly takes the ball away from Cissé. Now Gerrard comes dancing in like a fairy and oh! It's a kick to the balls from Ferdinand! And there's Gerrard, on his knees, having just hit the high "c""
by magickdio March 3, 2010
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1) The process by which women rate "weepy" films. The more it makes them cry, be it through sadness, relief, happiness or just because someone had a cute face, the higher the film will rank.

2) The process by which men rate pornographic films. The more it makes them ejaculate, be it through domination, bondage, bukkake or just because someone had a cute ass, the higher the film will rank.
1) "Oh my God, you so have to watch Marley and Me, it's like a five on the tissue test!"

2) "Oh my God, you so have to watch Lesbian Fuckwhores, it's like a five on the tissue test!"
by magickdio July 17, 2011
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1) Horny teenage couples in their droves flock to McDonald's for cheap, disgusting "food" every weekend. Sometimes, dipping the fries in those nasty little ketchup tubs gets too sexually suggestive for them, and they head off to the toilets to bang each other. They think it's risque, but almost everyone in McDonald's has no soul and no shame; their faces are deeply buried in greasy, supersized crap, so they barely notice the kids sneaking off for a McFuck.

2) McDonald's employees that are shagging at work are "McFucking". Presumably, the experience of being "Mcfucked" would lead to some serious "McShame", but as afore mentioned, those that spend large amounts of time in McDonald's have no souls, or personalities for that matter.
"Shall we go to McDonald's and get a McChicken Sandwich? We could sneak off for a quick McFuck too, if you wanna?"

"Norman and Shirley were McFucking at the end of last night's shift. I only noticed because I'm new here and still could go to heaven"
by magickdio March 7, 2010
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To be in "cock mode" is when men decide to give their brains a rest and let their penises take over. Cock mode is not a sensible way to operate on a night out. It will lead the unfortunate male into a diseased or unattractive female.

A guy ceases to run in cock mode within 3 minutes of ejaculating- usually when cognitive thought returns and the hideous beast they have just lain with comes into full focus.

Cock mode can be a good thing if you're in a long term relationship with a girl who does your head in. Switch off your brain and let your penis listen to the inane chatter instead, and then secure a nice orgasm for you. Sorted.
"Why on earth did you leave with that freak last night? She was seriously awful looking"

"I was in cock mode, I didn't really know what I was doing"

"Ah, totally understandable. I switch to cock mode when my wife starts talking. I'm virtually unreachable"
by magickdio April 22, 2010
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The main objective on a guys night out. To wrangle is to round up. A Ho is a loose woman.

A ho wrangler is a guy with massive easy girl pulling potential, who rarely ever spends a night alone, or with the same person more than twice.

A night of ho wrangling consists of bankrupting yourselves by buying numerous shots for women who are waiting at the bar, hoping that one might want to shag you. You will also dance in a grinding motion behind several women, in an attempt to wrangle them.
Vic's stag night is going to be a full on ho wrangling experience.
by magickdio August 20, 2010
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