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7 definitions by m954

 
1.
A super wealthy town in Bergen County, New Jersey. Saddle River rivals some of the countries wealthiest towns such as Bel Air, Greenwich and Atherton. The town's demographics are 95% white, the other 5% consists of blacks. But not black surgeons or lawyers, blacks who got lucky and make it into the pop industry. Saddle River is home to Russell Simmons and his soon to-be-ex-wife Kimora Lee Simmons (designer of 'urban-couture' brand Baby Phat), Rev Run (Joseph Simmons) and his family and Jason Kidd (not totally black, he is bi-racial). Russell and Kimora both live on Fox Hedge Road while Joseph Simmons (Russell's brother) resides on Wildwood Drive. Saddle River, although recently inhabited by trash is still a beautiful place to raise kids. School's are amazing although most parents send their kids to private school. But once you hit 18 and you receive your trust fund get out of Saddle River as fast as possible! There is nothing to do in that town, especially if you're a yuppie. As well as great schools Saddle River is laced with some fantastic estates. Alford Road, Ackerman Drive and the sought after location of Chestnut Ridge are home to magnificent estates; but don't expect to catch much of a glimpse at these beautiful homes without personally knowing the owner. The homes, atleast any home that costs 2 million or more (which is about every home) are surrounded by 6 foot tall hedges as well as wrought iron gates at the foot of the driveways. To top it off there are usually security cameras perched on the tall gates watching your every move. The only time you can catch a sneak peak at these amazing homes is in the winter when all the leaves are off, but most of the mansions have ever-green trees around their property which retain their leaves year-long. All in all, Saddle River is a beautiful place to raise your kids or retire to when you are older; but if your not making atleast 150k a year don't think about moving here, you might want to settle for Frankling Lakes or North Caldwell.
*2 people taking a trip. 1 lives in saddle River and the other is unfamiliar with Saddle river and they are driving down E. Saddle River Road.**
Person 1: Oh my gosh, look at that house!!
Saddle River Resident: That house is only 13,000 sq. ft though? There are much larger homes, drive through Alford Road or Fox Hedge Road. Those homes are easily 25,000+.
Person 1: Wow, I never knew homes were THAT huge.

by m954 May 26, 2008
66 16
 
2.
a secret room in most up-scale homes that protects inhabitants from intruders. a panic room can sometimes be a reinforced closet/bathroom or depending on the financing it could be a mini fortress. if the skys the limit a mini fortress would be best. panic rooms are often built while the house is still being built. panic rooms are lined with boolet proof materials such as kevlar and are often bomb proof. to insure that an intruder doesnt get into the room. they are often located close to the master bedroom. panic rooms often have a "key less" entry such as a retinal scanner, key pad or a finger print scanner. panic rooms are also stocked with first aid supplies and food and water and even toilets depending on the sevarity. panic rooms are the ultimate form of home security
*2 AM. alarm goes off*
woman- gets up to check it out, she sees 4 burglars on the first floor. *turns and runs toward bedroom*
*types in code and retreats to panic room*
( intruders have no idea the owner of the house is hidden in a secret room)
*police arrive and arrest intruders*
by m954 August 08, 2008
34 4
 
3.
the best damn water you can possibly buy. idc who you are fiji water is effin amazing. it tastes great, has a kick ass lookin bottle n is all around awesome. peepl just complain cuz they cant afford it...its about a thousand times better than poland spring and aqufina and dasani...the only water that compares to it is either Aquideco or Berg
2 people at a store
person 1- il have a bottle of poland spring please. (cost. $1)
person 2- il take a bottle of fiji (cost:$2.75)
person 1- WTF? y u drinkinj fiji its just the same as poland spring
person 2- Bitch NO! fiji has minerals and comes from an aquifer from a remote volcano! jeez. so ignorant ....not all water is the same
person 2- im sorry i didnt realize how awesome fiji water is
by m954 July 10, 2008
111 86
 
4.
Someone who is obsessed with another person so much that their whole life is following that person. They eat, sleep, breathe that person and sometimes want to be that person! wow, isnt that creapy? The type of person a stalker might stalk is their crush, ex wife or ex girlfriend or maybe someone they want to become. Typical things a stalker might do: follow you home from school/work, drive past your house often, hide in your bushes and watch you sleep, collect tissues you've used. Stalkers are EVERYWHERE, the best thing to do when being confronted by a stalker is remain calm, dont get a restraining order...that only makes them more mad.
girl- *walks out of her house* What's that? Whos there? *looks up in tree* OmG! who the fuck are you! get out of here you stalker!
stalker- No please! i love you! i need you! you = my life!
girl- HELP!!! someone help me! *runs into house, but stalker is already there waiting* howd u get in here so fast!
stalker- dont fight it, accept it...
girl- no help!!!!
stalker- *kidnaps girl and keeps her in his basement referring to her as 'Queen' and 'Mother'
by M954 May 27, 2008
39 26
 
5.
a creepy person who doesn't stalk people only their houses.....big houses. a house stalker may do things that others may find creepy n weird such as glancing at others credit cards to see their last name....only to track them down on yellowpages later. a house stalker will also use maps.live.com to view houses at all angles. a house stalker will only go after large homes tho in wealthy areas. a house stalkr in nj will probly track down alpine, saddle river, mantoloking, deal, bernardsville, essex fells, basking ridge, far hills, bedminster and others. house stalkers arent harmful just a tad creepy....but dnt worry they wont bite.....unless you try n snatch away their camera. a house stalker will then force his/her parents to drive them to the location of the big houses and they will proceed to take snapshots of the house from all different angles. they may do things such as fence hopping nd camera dodging cuz most of the houses that are stlked are large and have security cameras. they may also right down the owners license plate number if they happen to be comming or leaving but thats optional. house stalkers may track down wealthy celebs suck as k. lee and donald trump and find their house address.
**house stalker driving through saddle river**
HS- *sees huge mansion* stop the car! *DIVES OUT OF CAR INTO NEARBY BUSHES, pulls out camera** *click clik click** *sneakily crwls back into car n drives away*
owner- wtf? *runs to panic room*

house stalkers r creepy
by m954 July 10, 2008
9 4
 
6.
a place where angled and photo-shopped pictures is the norm; a place where a slutty scene whore can get raped or a place where a horny teen guy can get molested. its the ultimate battle of cameras....to see who can take the best pictures in the least ammount of clothes. myspace pictures are mainly taken in the bathroom from an angle where the face of the myspacer is barely visible. there is usually little to none clothes and the higher the camera angle the better the picture. the pictures are usually blurry n almost always photo shopped. myspace is a place where you can have thousands of friends without ever meeting them in person. myspace is refuge for losers of all kind and scene kids desperate to make it in the music industry. myspace is such a waste of time that any1 with a myspace should die a slow painful death
CAUTION: Myspace will suck you in like moths to a flame! BEWARE!
by m954 July 10, 2008
9 6
 
7.
a secret room in most up-scale homes that protects inhabitants from intruders. a panic room can sometimes be a reinforced closet/bathroom or depending on the financing it could be a mini fortress. if the skys the limit a mini fortress would be best. panic rooms are often built while the house is still being built. panic rooms are lined with boolet proof materials such as kevlar and are often bomb proof. to insure that an intruder doesnt get into the room. they are often located close to the master bedroom. panic rooms often have a "key less" entry such as a retinal scanner, key pad or a finger print scanner. panic rooms are also stocked with first aid supplies and food and water and even toilets depending on the sevarity. panic rooms are the ultimate form of home security
*2 AM. alarm goes off*
woman- gets up to check it out, she sees 4 burglars on the first floor. *turns and runs toward bedroom*
*types in code and retreats to panic room*
( intruders have no idea the owner of the house is hidden in a secret room)
*police arrive and arrest intruders*
by m954 August 03, 2008
11 15