Medical condition to describe the horrific chafing of the butt cheeks caused by long hard shifts in a hot sweaty environment. Is often exacerbated by tagnuts, winnets or dangleberries . Although there is no cure for this dreadfull ailment, many chefs I know swear by cornflour, well known for its high starch content. Some shave their asses to lessen the pain, others smear vaseline between the cheeks to lessen the friction, but the real masochists slather their ass in witchhazel upon the onset of symptoms
Chef's temper got worse during service as a dose of chefs arse played havoc in his kecks.
To keep nix is an old english boarding school term for keeping a lookout. It is thought to derive from the word that was shouted by said lookout when a housemaster or teacher approached. Younger boys were instructed to "keep nix" while the older boys smoked, drank, buggered each other etc etc.
"I say Jenkins, will you keep nix while I roger young perkins there!"
"Quick run here comes Mr Cooke"