17 definitions by fitofpeak
A shrewish, nagging spouse who thereby takes at least two years off of one's life for each year of marriage.
"Sorry, guys, I can't make the game -- the man-aging partner has me on garage cleanout duty, eff me."
by fitofpeak August 25, 2012
His readers were amused by his often lewdicrous turns of phrase, such as "She's had the clap so many times it's applause" or ""You must be nuts to be sleeping with her, or at least be thinking with them."
by fitofpeak June 26, 2012
An obstetrician, midwife, doula, neonatal nurse or pediatrician -- specifically, during the period beginning in January 2021, nine months after the COVID-19 lockdown began, and lasting the same length of time as the lockdown did (so called because of the baby boomlet surely resulting from all those fertile individuals who found themselves at home together for weeks on ends with time on their hands, if you get my meaning).
OMG, I can't believe the epic last responder shifts my obstetrician wife is pulling so far in 2021 -- all those @#$%! millennials couldn't just binge-watch and keep their hands to themselves for a couple of months?
by fitofpeak March 23, 2020
A metaphorical rule to live by: don't make the mistake of choosing the cheaper option to save a buck in the short run, when you'll curse yourself later for not getting the better-grade product/service in the long run.
Eric: "What was I thinking buying that Porsche with the V-4 instead of the V-6 -- it handled like a Formula 1 car but is a total slug in a straight line!"
Tim: "Dude, you broke rule number 1 -- don't leave horsepower in the showroom."
And so --
Maddie: "This well Margarita sucks -- why didn't I get the Cadillac for two bucks more?"
Amy: "Exactly. Don't leave horsepower in the showroom, sweetie."
Tim: "Dude, you broke rule number 1 -- don't leave horsepower in the showroom."
And so --
Maddie: "This well Margarita sucks -- why didn't I get the Cadillac for two bucks more?"
Amy: "Exactly. Don't leave horsepower in the showroom, sweetie."
by fitofpeak January 3, 2015
Adjective describing hyperbolic political speech that is so over-the-top polarizing as to be laughable, indeed hilarious.
Eric: Do you remember when Hillary Clinton called Trump's supporters a "basket of deplorables"?
Tim: Yeah, or when Trump called Rand Paul "a spoiled brat without a properly functioning brain"?
Eric and Tim: Yeah, polarious!
Tim: Yeah, or when Trump called Rand Paul "a spoiled brat without a properly functioning brain"?
Eric and Tim: Yeah, polarious!
by fitofpeak January 25, 2020
The state of being so engrossed in one's device (iPhone, iPad or equivalent) that one remains oblivious to all surrounding activity and communication and to the social norms that once governed them. Accordingly, the Law of iNertia states that a person engaged with his or her device will remain so engaged, regardless of any forces acting upon them to achieve a change of state. (The Law of iNertia thus operates contrary to the Law of Inertia, according to which a body at rest will remain at rest and a body in motion will continue moving with a constant velocity unless acted upon by an external non zero force.)
by fitofpeak July 27, 2014
The article produced when one inserts one's water-soaked iPhone into a box of white rice, desperately trying to resuscitate it by having the rice draw out the moisture.
"Dude, sorry I didn't text you -- I've got iPhone sushi here thanks to my wife washing my trou without checking the pockets."
by fitofpeak July 9, 2015