A distant cousin of the Good, Would, Could and Dud scale of shagability.
A should is someone you could have had sex with but didn't for whatever reason.
Ahh man, remember when we met Melanie Sykes in Manc, she was well pissed. What a should. WHAT WAS I THINKING????
A person with whom you 'could' have sex but don't want to. i.e it is physically possible.
One stage lower than a 'would', two stages lower than a 'good' but one higher than a 'dud'.
John - "What is the Good, Would, Could, Dud status of your new class mate?
Dave - "2 goods, 4 woulds, 3 coulds and 2 duds. Not bad really"
Rev Tolstoy - "How is the new choir leader Deacon Johnson?"
Deacon Johnson - "Well I could I suppose but I'd have to be fucking pissed"
This is a mythical act. No actual example of real "no Strings' has ever been witnessed.
No Strings is a concept that men think exist but actually doesn't. Certain women offer a "no strings" sex relationship to gullible males only to then proceed as it there are lots of strings. It is simply a honey trap, and an almost perfect one at that.
Millsy- "Elyssa offered me no strings fuck buddy sex so I went round and did her 3 times last night"
Lord Scotland - "I see, so how many times has she texted you today?"
Millsy - "456"
To go to the 'Holodeck" means to have sex with someone who you have de-humanised; i.e. you do not consider them to have thoughts and feelings like a real person, you just use them for sex.
Ian - " I went to the holodeck last night"
Dave - "Really who with?"
Ian - "Some slut I used to work with, she rang up wanting sex"
Dave - "You didn't say 'Computer end program' did you?"
Ian - "No but I did say 'For f***s sake' when she got her tits out, they were east westies."
Semen, jizm, spunk, ejaculate, man milk, population paste.
"I think I may have pinned down your problem Reverend Green, you will never get Mrs.Green pregnant if you keep withdrawing and covering her tits with your bliss piss, you need to fill her bucket"
"Thank you Doctor Williams, I will try that. It's just in the porn we watch they always ice the cake."
The lowest point on the good, would, could, dud scale. A person that you could not screw even if you were sick enough to want to. They may be just too ugly or it could be physically impossible or a NVEP - No viable entry point.
Craig - "This shag a fat bird contest wasn't fair, mine was a complete dud; I couldn't find a hole!"
Steven - "You knew what you were getting into, now bend over"
To extricate ones testicles onto the back of ones partner. In other words to withdraw and jack onto your partners back.
Onanism, Ice The Cake, Paint the Lady.
At the last minute she told me she wasn't on the pill so I had to back jack her.
I was going to blast insider her but she is his mum so I back jacked it.