Definitions by ctrlU

minge crust 

vegma deposited and dried onto a toilet seat

Jan's house is disgusting, from the rotten stuff in the fridge to the minge crust in the bathroom.

minge crust by ctrlU September 8, 2011

big mac 

n. A unit of evil or unhealthiness against which all other things are measured.

1. Twice the calories than a big mac
2. Half the fat than a big mac
3. One eighth the sodium than a big mac
4. More racist than a big mac
5. Ten times more radiation than a big mac
6. More unprotected sex than a big mac
7. More greedy than a big mac
8. 18 more mpg than a big mac
9. Bigger boobs than a big mac
10. half as ugly as a big mac
11. More deadly than two big macs
12. Smells like a steaming heap of big macs

etc.

big mac by ctrlU May 5, 2011

decimal phone 

n. a mobile phone without a full QWERTY keyboard.

Unlike a dumb phone, the decimal phone can have any number of advanced features but simply lacks the (crucial) above-mentioned I/O device.

Thomas: How come you never reply to my text messages?

Percy: I've still got a decimal phone and it sucks for texting!

decimal phone by ctrlU April 9, 2011

texclude 

v. To remove a thread's originator from the active conversation, sometimes completely changing the subject.

This thread started out as a post about my cat and now you people are arguing about French cinema. I hate it when you texclude me.

texclude by ctrlU April 2, 2011

ILHAT 

I Laughed Hard At That / This /Those

Thomas: Did you see that video with the dancing monkey?

Percy: ILHAT

ILHAT by ctrlU February 18, 2011

Christmas Bomb 

The colourful festive debris of wrapping paper scraps, bows, ribbon, and packaging that covers a room after the presents have all been opened.

It looks like a Christmas Bomb went off in here!

Christmas Bomb by ctrlU December 25, 2010

shit yer snatch 

To completely overreact to a situation. Obviously meant to apply to women but doubly effective when applied to a man, implying they are, in fact, actually a woman.

Thomas: We're going to be late again! We have to leave and you're still sorting mail and need a wash!

Percy: Ok, don't shit yer snatch! The fat controller can wait two minutes!

shit yer snatch by ctrlU October 20, 2010